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Old Nov 30, 2013, 01:37 AM
audk13 audk13 is offline
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Member Since: Nov 2013
Location: us
Posts: 2
I have not seen my family in years.

My parents are asian immigrants. They were never supportive of me and always put me down. I hated them.
My brother does not talk to me much either, but I do not hate him.

I wanted to study business, but my parents put me down and told me that I'd never be successful and it wasn't my skill set, that they think that I should study nursing or accounting. It hurt me deeply and I cried for a long time to find that they didn't support what I wanted to do. I told my parents that I hated and resend them and the reason that we have no money is because of them. The thing is that, if I wanted money for an accounting or nursing program, somehow they would be able to come up with the money or take out a loan for it, but they are unwilling to do it for something that I want to do, only what they want me to do. They are very "asian" and career focused and want me to be an accountant or something of that nature.

I told them that they were **** parents and that we have no money because of them. I said a lot of other bad things, and the sad part is that I actually meant most of it. When I say that I don't want to be an accountant, they just don't understand and start going crazy and yelling. I've tried many times already to tell them in many ways that I would like to do something else instead of becoming an accountant (or one of the other careers they want me to do) and they just don't understand. I like blogging, which they see as completely useless because I can never make a lot of money from it. Basically they want me to be an accountant, nurse or something else in the medical field or a stable career. If i don't want to do this, basically they want nothing to do with me.

They've told me that they are embarassed of me and they are better off without me, that they regret raising me. Sometimes they they lie to their friends saying that I'm studying to become a nurse or something random, and when I used to live with my parents, they would never let their friends come by when I was home.

All I ever wanted from my parents was just their support for something what I want to do. But, they will only support me if I choose something they want me to do (medicine, accounting) otherwise it's like I have no parents..

My dad sent me a random email the other day (I have not even talked to him in over 3 years..) telling me that they are fine with out me. And to not bother them.

I hate my dad so much that.. I wish he would just buy an insurance policy and die, and I want to tell him this. The sad thing is that it's true.

My parents aren't there for support or help me with anything. And I really need the money. I hate my parents so much that I wished they would just buy an insurance policy and die. That is how much that I hate them.

I don't know how to deal with this, I have a lot of hatred inside of me, and it's been this way for many years, basically my whole life.
Hugs from:
Travelinglady

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  #2  
Old Dec 01, 2013, 12:00 AM
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Travelinglady Travelinglady is offline
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Member Since: Sep 2010
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 49,212
Hello and welcome to Psych Central! From what I have heard about Asian families, your parents aren't all that unusual. I guess a lot of their children must just decide to go along with what their parents want.

Of course, it's your choice what you want to do with your life. I find it very sad that your parents don't want anything to do with you unless you do what they say. I would have a lot of anger toward them, too, if I were you.

Have you had any experience in business? Maybe you could see about finding a job in the business world. Is your money problem about going to school mainly?
  #3  
Old Dec 01, 2013, 05:55 PM
audk13 audk13 is offline
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Member Since: Nov 2013
Location: us
Posts: 2
I am starting a new job in business, which my parents do not support. It's nothing glamorous and I don't excel at business, probably even below average, so my parents do not want me to do it. But I enjoy it, more than other things. With their support, if they supported me the way they would if I wanted to become a nurse, it would help. I mean, if I tried my best and they gave me their support if I did business, I would be better than if I did something that I had no interest in like nursing, even with all their support. But they don't support this choice in my life, so they think any money given to me for this will go to waste. They think people should only do what their skill set is in life, something that will be a stable job. Nothing like art or writing.

I need money for some health problems too.

I thought that they could change, but they never do.

Do you think that I should try to keep trying with them or just give up?
I've basically just given up.
But if I give up, basically it means that I've accepted my parents will always suck, and then I really mean it when I say something like, I wish that they would just buy some life insurance and die. I told them that since they don't support me on anything, they shouldn't even be parents. That I wish I had different parents. I said a lot of nasty things to them. That they are completely useless as parents.
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