[snowday]

Marriage is not going too well... Long, long story but one of the main problems i'm seeing is that we're never on the same page with expectations.

One thing i've noticed is that hubby doesn't like to commit to things, cooking dinner he'll do it if he's around, but don't ask for a commitment to a certain day. If he gets in the mood to rake up the leaves, he might....but generally that mood doesn't strike so the leaves either stay put or I have to do it.

He also doesn't like to make decisions from everything to where to order dinner to where to stay on vacation. I feel like the two are connected, but long story short he feels like he's very flexible and "does what I want!" Really it just adds to my job of deciding everything and doing anything not getting done!

I'm pretty certain he thinks he does enough, although i'm uncertain who is supposed to do the list of what doesn't get done?!! Anyway long story short i'd like to find out what his feelings are on where he sees things going, who is going to do things along the way. Currently i'm living in a fairly decent sized house raising kids pretty much by myself because he doesn't make enough decisions to parent effectively. I know a mess!

So without causing a major drama i'd like to see where he sees things going? What specifics would you ask if you were me? Kids are in high school and I want my time living in this house to be limited, too much work, not enough help! I also don't think it works for people to just contribute what they feel they can when one clearly can ignore things better than the other.

I'm trying to see the future and what I need to ask (and trust me I know this sounds crazy, but it's been a crazy week and i'm tired.) So housing, chore responsibilities, what retirement looks like? That seems so vague....any advice?