[betty3]

What can a wife or girlfriend do when she discovers that her husband or boyfriend is a sex addict, especially to internet porn. It damages the trust between the couple. It is soooo hard to rebuild it. Any suggestions?

[dexter]

Hi Betty and welcome to the forums here.

Does the boyfriend or husband know/admit he has a problem? Is he willing to get help for it? Does he understand how his behavior effects others?

If he's unwilling to try to change or doesn't think it is a problem then I doubt there's much one can do... Maybe join a support group or get some counseling to help deal with the issue, but ultimately she will have to decide where she wants to be in her future.

If the guy sincerely wants to get help, there are addiction programs for just about everything that can be really effective. Might be best to start by talking with a doctor or therapist to see what options are available.

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--http://www.idexter.com

[gloria]

Have you talk to him? What does he do? Does he watches porn or does he participates in cyber sex?

He really needs to know how it makes you feel ... and perhaps, you need to hear how it makes him feel too, and find a way to make it work making decisions that makes sense to make.

gab

[gloria]

a step at a time .... communication and respect here is the key.

[betty_3]

Sex addiction is powerful addiction. Powerful enough to cause the addict to lie, cheat, steal (time/money), neglect those who love him, cost him his job, etc. And, it is very hard to treat. If you continue in this relationship, please go to a support group that deals with the partners of addicts. You'll be able to get support for yourself as the recovery progresses.

[san diego]

Originally Posted by betty3

What can a wife or girlfriend do when she discovers that her husband or boyfriend is a sex addict, especially to internet porn. It damages the trust between the couple. It is soooo hard to rebuild it. Any suggestions?

As one who has worked with men in trying to over come this I recommend you insist her go to SAA or SLAA meetings 4-6 to understand what he is doing to you. You get support and know it is not an action taken by him to replace you but to medicate his problems. I recommend COSA meetings for you. Good luck.

[Me&mylife]

[QUOTE=betty_3;32861]Sex addiction is powerful addiction. Powerful enough to cause the addict to lie, cheat, steal (time/money), neglect those who love him, cost him his job, etc. And, it is very hard to treat. If you continue in this relationship, please go to a support group that deals with the partners of addicts. You'll be able to get support for yourself as the

I must agree 100%. My fiancé was all of the above. We've been together 5 years now. It didn't take me long to figure out his porn ritual & it was so much worse than I could ever imagine! Late August of 2013 I felt I had to end our relationship w/ the man I dearly loved. I was devastated! Not only do I have MDD, Anxiety Disorder, & Insomnia which I have maintained for 23 years & feel very blessed, I started having several panic attacks, seeing & hearing things/people & could not walk out of my front door for over a month. Today he is in SSA & doing fairly well. In 6 months of recovery he made his 1st 30 days. He did have a slip but received is 30 day chip once again yesterday. We are dating, trying to start a new life. I don't feel that I had given up on him in August of 2013, after 5 yrs of going through this & he still wasn't willing to get help, I had to put myself & my children's well being 1st. Today I have much faith in him & myself! This program is something that has to be maintained in many ways for the both of us the rest of our lives. It's not easy but it darn sure will be worth it!
Sorry I wrote so much.