Hii everyone, just wondered, is it weird to be friends with someone who is five years younger than you or even younger or vise versa? Same with dating, do you think an age gap that is large matters? I was under the impression that it is not good but not sure if that is true or not.

[hvert]

It depends on the age of the people involved. 5 years is a huge difference between a 17 year old and a 12 year old. It's still pretty big between 16 and 21. If one person is 20 and the other is 25, it's not so much of a big deal.

Originally Posted by hvert

It depends on the age of the people involved. 5 years is a huge difference between a 17 year old and a 12 year old. It's still pretty big between 16 and 21. If one person is 20 and the other is 25, it's not so much of a big deal.

That makes sense. I know someone who is almost 23 and is dating a 39 year old. I feel like that is too much but I could be wrong.

[brainhi]

Age does not matter - unless it sexual and the person is under age and the other person is older & what are the real motives for the older person.

People are free to enjoy all types of other people - there is no "should" it is your life and you get to make the choices - if it was a wrong choice - hope to learn quickly from it and not do it again.

[waiting4]

Age difference in and of itself, should not be a deal breaker (as long as both parties are adults, of course)...my ex was 5 years younger than I am but that had nothing to do with my breaking up with him. We were very much alike as far as interests. My ex H was five years older than I am...and again, had nothing to do with our eventual divorce.

If you are of like minds...then that's all that should matter. IMO

[Atlantea]

@hvert: I agree in that context. I am 38 I have friends who are early 40's and early 30's, and some in 20's. I think if you're at least 21 as the younger one in the gap, there should be nothing to worry about society-wise.

I always worry about the age gap too esp with dating, but I've seen people in successful relationships who have pretty big age gaps. My 27 yo cousin is dating someone 11 years his cougar. And they are a huge match.

I don't think a 5-6 year age gap is dramatic though.

[Lonelyheart22]

I always felt more attraction towards people quite a bit older than myself and I myself am more like a modern, fit, lively middle aged person than my fellow 20something year olds.
So I do not think there is a problem as long as both people are into it for honest reasons and truly get along.

Originally Posted by hvert

It depends on the age of the people involved. 5 years is a huge difference between a 17 year old and a 12 year old. It's still pretty big between 16 and 21. If one person is 20 and the other is 25, it's not so much of a big deal.

A very good point.

Age difference between adults should not matter at all, if the age gap affects interests and common values it will matter and some of the time it does but if the two people, again assuming both are adults have common ground to enjoy each other's company it matters very little IMO.

[ChipperMonkey]

I don't think 5 or even 10 years is much to worry about. Of course, given that all parties are adults. When I was 31 I was seeing someone who was 21. I never would have gone after someone so young, but he was the one who pursued me, and to us, age wasn't really a factor. I have almost always dated younger and he always dated older. His last GF was only a couple of years younger than me.

As long as both people are over age 18, anything goes - legally. I will say, however, that age does matter - in my experience. My husband was 16 years older than me and although we are very much alike in many ways, the generational difference is very big.

The man I live with for the past decade is 6 years younger than I am. Our age difference is not tremendously apparent...I would say that differences in life experience is a frequent problem. Still, if I could I would be with a partner who is within 2 years of my own age.

[offthegrid]

If you guys are in different life stages then it can be difficult. If one party is/was in a position of authority over the other I would highly discourage the relationship as it can cross ethical boundaries and can lead one person to manipulate the other. By authority I mean, if one person were a teacher/mentor type role.