[andrew26]

Me and my now ex-fiance have been together about two years. I have always known that she did not want children, and I was always unsure. It came to a point in our relationship that we really needed to talk about this issue. She justs wants it to be me and her. I said that I wanted children someday, and this left us seperated. I was ok with this decsion for about a week. Now I find myself very sad. I cannot stand not being with her, not seeing her. I love her very deeply. I am not sure If I am being selfish, or if I just need to decide if it is more important to get what I want (children) or be with the person who has made me the happiest I have ever been in a very long time, maybe ever. What can I do?

[SeptemberMorn]

Either you need to talk through it some more or realize that the difference between you will always be there nagging at you. You could both become bitter in time. Then she would no longer make you happy.

[razeljenny]

Andrew 26- how aboout you guys have a baby. Why not get married after you both decide to have a baby. If I could have a baby real soon with my future husband, or should I say hopefully future spouse, I would just just really really want to , you know?

Havin a family, howerver small, is neat, and possible. Just say a prayer that this dream girl of yours will truly tell ya that she too wants to have her own little family with ya.Good things are in the cards and she probably really wants to have your baby too, and probably easily can have a son with ya. It's not too late. Communicate this story to her again, and see the goodness come forth, atleast look for it. If you see not a hint of it, maybe you better find another spouse because you want a little new family and deserve one for yourself, and there is nothing wrong with it.

Me and my guy wish for a baby by the way and I want to get hitched and have one of "gods blessings," !!!

Hi Andrew,
I hope you don't see this as being unsupportive but to look at this from a woman's point of view-once she has a kid, her life is over-no more free time, her body gets taken over for 9 months and then when the baby leaves it, her body is fat, flabby and in a shambles-meanwhile, everyone's fussing over the baby while she basically gets very little attention, no more romantic alone time with you, no more social life, she'll have more housework to do, being stranded at home with the kid 24/7, losing her financial freedom 'cause she's gotta quit work, etc... From then on it's all about her taking care of that baby while your out doing whatever you want, when you want. You may change a diaper or two and rock it to sleep every once so often but for her it's a 24/7 job that she's basically taken for granted for and expected to take. I'm not saying you're wrong for wanting to have a baby, I think it's really sweet and very natural but I can definetly respect her point of not wanting a baby. Maybe if you can see if from another female's perspective you'd understand a little better and this understanding could leave you having a better connection with what she's going through and why she may not want to have children. By the way, did she say why or try to explain? I hope this helps a little. Best wishes for the both of you.