TBI and relationships

I have been involved with a TBI patient for the past few years. I am much older than he, and have tried to push him toward individuals of his age in the past and had wanted to leave because I thought that would be best for him. He remembers a specific time over two years ago that he hyperventilated because I thought I should leave. Even though I wanted him to continue with someone younger, I also was conflicted that leaving would do damage, so I continued to stay. I care about this individual very much. Recently, I got a job near him after he was discharged from the army because I really thought that we would be good for each other. I, felt very close to him and felt safe. He liked being with me and I had helped him a lot through the past several years as he went through cranioplasty surgery and rehab centers. After living in the same house for several weeks, it was a continual battle to explain to him that the time he hyperventilated and other times when I was going to leave, that I wanted what what was best for him. I have since left because although he said I was welcome to stay in his home, he continually stated that he felt trapped by my presence and would not feel free until I was gone. He thought that I was judging his every move. It is also notable that in every rehab facility he has been in, he felt this way toward others who were part of his treatment team. since I left, and while I was there, he had come to the conclusion that I have been messing with his mind for the past several years and has put me on a "list" of people who have abandoned him and of those he hates, in essence. There seems to be no convincing him otherwise. I am terribly at a loss and feel terrible since I do care for this individual very much. It is difficult to accept that after almost three years of being there and being close to someone, that they view you as a "witch" that "would have been burned in 1692". Yes, I understand that the TBI is very much to blame, but I am still having a difficult time being dismissed by someone that up until a month ago, was very close to.

Welcome to the Community, target1. You are grieving. Because of the circumstances, you must be vigilant to avoid complicated grief: Complicated grief Definition - Diseases and Conditions - Mayo Clinic

I wish you well.