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Old Aug 21, 2014, 12:05 PM
seawhale seawhale is offline
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Member Since: May 2014
Posts: 132
Without stating too much details, I and him were friends for several months, and then we had a small fight which escalated into a bigger fight over emails and phone calls, we settled the subject and next day he called me again to provoke me, the problem went into a very very big one and I blocked him on fb, then we made a peace agreement and shared apologizes. We are sitting in the same office together btw, and we got back together on fb.

Then and although we settled everything, he started bullying me without any reason, he just want to raise troubles with me, after the fight I was so careful about every action and every word in order to avoid him and avoid any future conflicts or fights, I did not even say one word that even may makes him upset, a couple of weeks ago he unfriended me suddenly on fb, then I asked him why, he just said any nonsense reason and then he asked me to add him again, I did and he accepted.

He is making tricky and provocative actions, talking sometimes in a bad way, we are at the same level, same age, he has no authority on me, leaving his empty cup on my desk intentionally, and much more provocative actions that he does it to just stress me, today he unfriended me on fb again, but ok this time I don't care and I will not even ask him why.

He is talking about me bad I am sure several of our mutual coworkers changed with me.

Now what can I do with him.
- Tried to totally avoid someone who is sitting in the desk in front of me and have some common work together is almost impossible.
- Bully him back: ok but he is really and evil person and aggressive and bullying him back will not solve the issue, it will just make the problem worse.
- Official complain: well I do not want to put my self into such situation like a small kid, going to the manager and complain about his college like school pupils, moreover, results and consequences are not guaranteed.
- leaving the company because of someone is also nonsense and finding a new job is never that easy.
- I tried many times to talk to him very kindly, friendly and peacefully to improve our relation status, he just pretend that there is nothing wrong and everything is ok.

How to live with this idiot, I want to live and work in peace, please advice.

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  #2  
Old Aug 21, 2014, 09:44 PM
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Travelinglady Travelinglady is offline
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Member Since: Sep 2010
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 49,212
Hey, seawhale. Have you considered that this guy might be mentally ill? (Perhaps borderline?) I am just guessing. But you might check into the book "Stop Walking on Eggshells" to see if any of that sounds familiar, and if so, what you can do about it.

I suggest just trying to ignore the guy. It sounds like he can't be a good friend, and you don't need him on FB. If he puts a cup on your desk, then just throw it away, etc. And keep thinking about the positive aspects of your job.
  #3  
Old Aug 22, 2014, 03:06 AM
seawhale seawhale is offline
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Member Since: May 2014
Posts: 132
Quote:
Originally Posted by Travelinglady View Post
Hey, seawhale. Have you considered that this guy might be mentally ill? (Perhaps borderline?) I am just guessing. But you might check into the book "Stop Walking on Eggshells" to see if any of that sounds familiar, and if so, what you can do about it.

I suggest just trying to ignore the guy. It sounds like he can't be a good friend, and you don't need him on FB. If he puts a cup on your desk, then just throw it away, etc. And keep thinking about the positive aspects of your job.

Yes, I was thinking about that indeed, he might be psychologically ill.
Many thanks for your kind and supportive reply
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