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  #1  
Old Aug 28, 2014, 08:44 PM
indiepixie indiepixie is offline
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I went out with this boy for 2 years and at the time I wad going through a tough time with my family, and as a result was really depressed. I broke up with my boyfriend as I couldn't handle a relationship being this mentally unwell. I eventually pulled my self back together over the course of 6 months and I wouldn't really consider myself depressed anymore. I am not talking to him again as we spoke about maybe seeing each other again if i got myself better and he had since had a girlfriend but it didn't work out because he didn't feel she loved him like I did. But the problem is in feeling a little bit low again, is it possible that he in himself is making me ill? Even though he is lovely to me.
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  #2  
Old Aug 29, 2014, 02:03 AM
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curley curley is offline
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Hey Indie if this boy is nice to you and you really like him then your feelings of being "mentally unwell" are something you need to work out!
I do believe that being around or in a relationship can affect a person and bring them down, but then again it would be on that person to work on their mental issues.
So find out what is really bothering you.
Good luck
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  #3  
Old Aug 29, 2014, 03:06 AM
Anonymous100185
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There is folie a deux of course... But no mental illness isnt contagious only hysteria.
  #4  
Old Aug 29, 2014, 07:15 AM
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A Red Panda A Red Panda is offline
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Mental illness isn't contagious; there can be both genetic and environmental influences to them though, and researchers still don't know/agree about them fully.

That said - depressions fluctuate. They can be suicidal, or lethargic, or angry, or mild, and anything else really. And someone who has depression isn't stuck with it 100% of the time - episodes dissipiate over time (how long of a time depends) and even within the episode the intensity can increase and decrease.

What you have outlined in your brief post is that you went into an environmental depression based upon family issues. 6 months after breaking up with your boyfriend and you were able to feel like your normal self again. That's 6 months of processing whatever was going on in your family. It doesn't sound like he had any impact on it, as you haven't mentioned anything he might have been doing that would contribute to feeling poorly.

If you're feeling a little bit low right now, that doesn't mean it's depression or that a depression is returning. It could just be feeling of guilt over breaking up, feelings of being replaced as he had a new relationship for a while, worries over having a depression come back if you try things with him again and then breaking up again.... or all sorts of other things.
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  #5  
Old Aug 29, 2014, 07:29 AM
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winter4me winter4me is offline
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Sometimes, being around someone who has seen us/been there when we are not well, can revive some of those feelings. Good for you for taking the time you needed to work things out. Give it some time, see how it goes, and do share those feelings/thoughts with the boyfriend. It may be important for you to know how he saw you then, and how he sees you now---and that he is not someone who is particularly drawn to someone in trouble---as a rescuer/caregiver---or, that that is acknowledged and dealt with--doesn't sound like that off hand. Good luck!!!
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  #6  
Old Aug 29, 2014, 08:25 AM
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lilypup lilypup is offline
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I know that boyfriend break ups and parents fighting constantly were some of the big stressors that led to crashing depressions. I had the tendency to depression, but these things set it off.
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  #7  
Old Aug 29, 2014, 10:07 AM
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healingme4me healingme4me is offline
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There's still a chance that though he's lovely to you, he's toxic in a covert way. And yet, your homelife stresses could have left you feeling emotionally spent and unable to give to the relationship.

Many variables. ..
Thanks for this!
winter4me
  #8  
Old Aug 29, 2014, 05:37 PM
glok glok is offline
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Depression Is Contagious
  #9  
Old Aug 29, 2014, 08:30 PM
linuxensis linuxensis is offline
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It can.

It all depends on how we respond to and feel when around others.
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