I don't understand why he rejected me?!?

if he was sexually abused as a boy then your not respecting his boundaries may have been quite triggering for him. if anything it's good to be extra aware of his boundaries considering his past and to not push someone who was abused. obviously, his reaction of getting up and leaving was a bit insensitive but not all that surprising with his history. i'd apologize to him if you haven't already. i realize you are young so you may not be as aware of how this affected him. just try to be more conscious of it in the future.

I learned in my thirties, too. There's much about relationships and such, that would have been good knowledge in my twenties. Yet, no do overs, so to speak. My twenties are what brought me to what I learned in my thirties. Forties is looking fantabulous.

I just turned 40 so I feel like late teens through late 30's would have been so much better with some life skills! Better to learn now than never learn from all those painful lessons. Now people better watch out if they are expecting the same reactions from me!

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& I knew that was the last time I was going to see him, or be intimate with him, because he's moving out of state. That's why I wanted to connect with him physically one more time, too.

It's not like he left the relationship, he left the house at night to get some sleep. In fewer words then you would have liked him to say, he did set boundaries. "no," is a pretty solid statement. Your statement, "boundaries are only boundaries when clearly stated, otherwise it's resentment", was generalized and false, healing4me. I've had more serious posts written up and erased because I'm just trying to stay out of it but this post is triggering for me as well. I am not coming anywhere close to being angry at CosmicRose, she made a mistake and acknowledged it, which is good and its been clarified that the guy probably got frustrated and left, to make any assumptions about why he did it in the way it's being done or to coddle the OP while at the same time insulting the man is sexist and victim blaming. I didn't want to post on here as OP's post should not be the place for a whole argument on gender roles but there are enough people here perpetuating the problem out of sheer ignorance I felt compelled to say something. Feel free to respond but I will not as I'm leaving this argument to take care of myself, but its pretty blatantly obvious that mistakes were made and OP should not be held 100 percent responsible but the man did nothing wrong and a significant amount of sexist issues have been placed on this man's head from little knowledge of him at all.

I'm not sure I agree with the people who are calling it "victim blaming", he isn't a "victim" nor am I a "perpetrator". That's taking it too far.

He wasn't the "victim" earlier that night when he was thoroughly enjoying himself with me but somehow because I asked three times and he storms out that makes me the bad guy and him the victim.
And by the way him storming out did end the relationship because as I stated before, we won't see each other again, he's moving - that was the last date we were ever going to be on and we both knew it.

and I'm not going to apologize for asking one too many times, I won't call or text him or see him ever again. Yes I feel bad but to act like I did something so wrong is really out of line here. Within a two hour period, asking a man you're laying next to practically naked, and knowing its the last time you're EVER going to see him - come on.

Wow so many comments on what seems to be such a cut and dried issue. A 3 times 'no' couldn't be a more definite no . NO!!! nuff said. Funny how sex always elicits a lot of comments. But then I guess we all like talking about sex . Well most of us do. And the older you get.... that's ALL we can do haha.

Excuses, excuses.

My perspective on this issue is little different....Though i was never so lucky to leave someone on the spot.....and I have been victim of many incidents like that in my life...I admit I am not successful in such relationships.
I think we , girls are very much honest and pure in our relationships whereas boys ( may not be all but most ) are little moody and blunt type. We being girls need to know the reasons behind strange behaviors whereas boys needn't.
Moreover, when we kiss the world, the world would kick us in return for sure.....
hope you get me.
love

Well, i understand what 'generalizations' mean as a comment on PC. Since, the conversation is moot. I, too, shall bow out.

After everything you know about him and after everything that has been said, I am amazed at your comments. I don't think you are getting what has been said.....could it be your ego is a little bruised and this being your reason for posting? If it is, then now you should look at it from his point of view.

Being able to put aside your own feelings (for a bit!) to be able to consider someone else's point of view and feelings are great quality's to have IMO.

I understand why you got upset but now you should think about what his side of it was and how he may have felt.

I know you are young and I think this is partly why you may not be getting this...but just for a second, forget he turned down a naked lady and think about what was going on with him.

Another possibility was, he knew this was your last time together and he got too overwhelmed and just left? I dunno...but I think you need to speak to him about it.

Well ... Since this situation as been talked to death and could go on and on... I will toss my 2 cents in as well.

The only way I see this is... you asked 3 times and he said no 3 times and left .. You will never hear his side since you and him will never talk again according to you so trying to know for certain what he was or wasn't thinking is a useless exercise.

Why not "use" this situation as a learning tool ? In the future when you ask a man and he says No .. Take it as a no and don't keep asking.

I hope your able to find closure at some point and your able to move on into a new relationship.

Just my opinion of course

I wish you the best