[JackBlack]

I think I'm being abused and don't even know it. Which is worse... Physically abuse with bruises and physical injuries or abuse from someone lying repeatedly and all the very bad things that come of that?

[IrisBloom]

Abuse is abuse, no matter what form it takes. In some cases mental can be worse than physical, as inner wounds are harder to heal. If you are not being treated as a human worthy of respect, love, and consideration, you are being abused.

[lilypup]

I think you know in your gut what abuse is. If you're asking about it, it is probably abuse.

[~Christina]

Abuse is abuse .... Remove them or yourself from the situation. Life is too short to be unhappy.

[cat2992]

It's hard to tell from your brief post whether it's abuse if your spouse is lying to you. They could be lying to cover up infidelity, gambling or other addictions or actually just trying to hurt you via messing with your mind.

Therapy might be a way for you to sort through what's going on from your perspective and help you identify what steps to take next.

And leavings isn't as easy as it sounds. Usually the abuser has weakened the abused spouse so much mentally that it takes significant courage and a concrete plan (with a focus on the future without abuse as a reality) and outside support to get to a point where getting out is the option.

Best wishes and keep us up to date!

[Slamjammer]

If your wife is lying to you, she obviously wants to cover-up something. Could be anything. This is disrespectful and may be hurtful, but it isn't "abuse" per se...it's deceit, which can be even more destructive to a relationship.

You need to get to the bottom of it.