[CJR520]

Maybe I can talk to others better if I let it all out! Last summer, son and wife were fighting terrible, if you all remember they built beautiful new home and she said she hated it, wanted her parents home because it was all she had left of her Dad. Her mother had alzheimers, not real bad, but she insisted Mom stay with them and four litlle ones. My son and his wife pick on the oldest child, a little girl who will be ten this month. Poor little thing does nothing right, and they pick on her together. Anyhow, the mother was running away from home, and telling everyone she could how miserable she was with them, and how bad they treated the oldest child. On my birthday in October, my son tried to commit suicide while we were away for a few days. Come to find out, he was having an affair with a coworker. After that, and hospitalization and help, they think they want to make things work. Belong to Apostolic church, and the church was also a big problem for them. The so called minister told my dil she should just suck it up!! I think this is wrong!!! Anyhow, after stories about dil, the church, hating her parents home, etc. etc. now they are right back in the same place except our son is on meds. Thanksgiving was horrible. My daughter had it at her house, and these two got into it with her mother and ruined that. The mother in law died a couple of weeks before Xmas a miserable human being with my son and her daughter just wanting her property and everything she had. They got what they wanted!! So, Christmas was also a mess, and we are still struggling. On Valentines Day, I ask them over for dinner, and made it real nice for the kids with cutout cookies and all. I caught my son and daughter in law forcing my grandaughter to eat a whole bowlful of salad that she had accidentally spilled Italian dressing in and I am talking more than half a 16 ounce bottle. I had put the salad on the counter and was starting to clean up, went to do something for my husband, and they made her 'eat' the whole bowl full and all that dressing!! I was just sick over it! Another time ruined. When I caught them, she had eated it all and was crying. I told her to stop and go play with the other kids. Her brothers and sister don't even have to eat what is on their plates, but they always force her to do whatever. I am so sick of it!! One week later I had the kids overnight, and got a chance to talk to my grandaughter myself. I told her that what they had done was wrong, and that Papaw and I would not let anything like that happen at our house again. I haven't heard from any of them for a couple of weeks. I figure the grandaughter may have told them what I said and they are angry with me. I don't really care right now, as long as that little girl is o.k., and I will not let them abuse her here ever again. They are unhappy, and for some reason, take it out on her. That is just sick!! So, now, maybe I can come back in here. I just needed to let it out.

[cajun]

Hang in there CJR. I feel so bad for the child. The cumulative effects of mental abuse is difficult to deal with. I am 42 and still dealing with these issues.

[Smilie]

First and for most you have the right to control what ever goes on in your house, no matter whom it is. I commend you on your bravery and compassion on that child. That would have made me sick too. I have four daughters.Gosh! My heart goes out to her.

Smilie

[CJR520]

Thanks guys! I know that I have to speak up from now on no matter what so that my grandaughter will hear me and know that I am on her side. She can come to us at any time, and if it ever gets too bad, she can come stay with us.

have you talked to them about their abuse of your granddaughter? i think i'd have a little talk and suggest counseling. in the meantime write down everything that you've seen and heard them do. document everything. you may need it someday. that child deserves a decent life.

we're here for you. pat

[Wants2Fly]

I agree exactly with what Pat wrote. Someday, you may have to be an advocate for that poor child, and you will need your written notes. I hope you can stay in touch, for the girl's sake. Would she be allowed to have sleep over's at your home, so that she can have some time away from them? This is such a sad situation.

[CJR520]

Yes, my grandaughter does get to come here and stay all night. They have some issues that they need to deal with and realize that she is growing up, and fast! I will be here for her, and she knows it. I love them all, but this little gal comes first right now. Thanks!!