[stephiifaye92]

So, to give a little back story, there's a man who's a vendor at work, I see him almost every day. He's a little older than I am, and he used to be kind of flirtatious and overstepped the boundaries when I wanted to be left alone. But before that we got along very well, as friends and nothing more. I had him on Facebook and left a conversation up between us. My boyfriend got angry even though it was honestly nothing bad.
I blocked and deleted him out of respect for my boyfriend. But we still remained friends at work. It was a vulnerable time in my life and I was going to break up with my boyfriend. We ended up working things out.
I got pregnant a fwe months later and turned into a total ***** at work, and I got him in trouble at work, nothing huge, just further asking the bosses to ask him to leave me alone.

So about a week ago, almost a year since I last spoke with the man I work with, I apologized, told him he wasn't a bad guy and I was miserable being pregnant. He accepted and we've been on good terms. My boyfriend doesn't like him to this day. And today I got out 2 1/2 hrs early and I called my bpyfriend, phone was dead, messaged him on facebook, didn't answer. Called my grandmother, where he was supposed to be, he wasn't there. So the man I work with and I always have joked around withe each other and not entirely serious I messaged him ' hey wanna bring me home I'm stuck at work for a few hrs..no.I'm just kidding I'm just bored and I know I'll be here for a while, saying hi' but he really offered to bring me home, which was tit all out of the way for him and was very nice, so I stuck around until he came. My boyfriend finally messages me as I'm waiting and I say no its okay someone from works giving me a ride..not usually a big deal. I wasn't about to make my ride turn around half way after working plans around me, having to backtrack to pick up his kids from school...etc. so he brought me home and my be asks exactly who it is giving me a ride, I didn't see until I got home. But that's not usually like him to press it. So I figure, hey, my tablet should have the stupid little chat heads on it, right ? Nope.
Meaning, my bf went thru my messages and expected me to try to lie to him.
Since day 1 of pregnancy, my be has playfully accused me of cheating, straight out asked me if it was his, made jokes about the baby coming out black (the man I work with is black)
He's been extremely negative lately now too, and still continuously does all of those things. I can't take it anymore because I wouldn't leave my stuff out in the open if I had something to hide, I have never lied to him, I told him who gave me the ride, and I've never once cheated.
Now he's acting all weird toward me and superior needy trying to grope me literally every single friggn chance he gets, and its just irritating.
so I'm not sure how to treat this situation.

[LookingforCalm]

I hate to ask this, but is he cheating?
From personal experience, the ones the most jealous are the ones doing the act they are accusing you of. And I sadly see the "playful" way he asks you if the baby is his as a HUGE warning sign...

He went through your messages? This isn't playful anymore. Something is up, and he's making you feel bad about his insecurity. Do you have friends or family that could possibly help you?

I'm not trying to be negative, but I've witnessed this behavior personally and other friends going through it. Usually the arguments escalate, because the one who is being accused gets sick of it and the other person gets angry because of guilt. I hope, in this case, that I'm wrong.

Just - be careful. And if you have friends and family, I would keep in touch as much as possible.

[healingme4me]

Is your bf open to the suggestion of therapy?

[hvert]

Your boyfriend is out of line, but the situation with this other guy sounds like bad news, too.

I would be angry if my boyfriend had some woman that had the hots for him at work, someone flirtatious enough that management was called in, and then he got a ride home from the person and didn't immediately respond to my text asking who was driving him. Not saying it's rational, but it's how I would feel.

Obviously, since you haven't cheated on him, your boyfriend is wrong -- but I would try to imagine how you would feel if the situation was reversed. Maybe if you do that, your boyfriend can do the same for you and try to imagine how irritating it is to be accused of things you aren't doing.