This society doesn't support family closeness. Individuality is all that matters. Standing strong alone, separating from family, being self sufficient and never asking for help: all of these things are greatly prized by society today.
My family is a good example of this. We have a lot of mental illness in my family and I think that has caused us to drift apart, but also a lack of drive to stay together and support eachother. I have never met my: great aunts and uncles (still alive until recently), cousins, second cousins, my uncles entire family, my aunt's family.
My family wasn't forced to separate, but I think societal norms allowed this to happen. I hate it. Even my direct aunts and uncles are estranged from us, because of mental illness or just a lack of interest in coming together.
The most terrible thing, I think, is that my nuclear family is deeply affected by this. We all tend to operate on a very individual level, and while it is good to maintain self sufficiency, I think too much of it is harmful. We aren't compassionate towards eachother like a family ought to be. We do not support eachother in mental illness.
My father deals with his mental illness in private, like it's a shameful thing. He does not come to us for help. Well, fine.. he's the head of his family, but what about my younger brother? He's also dealing with mental illness by himself. He doesn't confide in anyone.
And there's me. I'm expected to deal on my own. When I confessed several months ago that I was having a mental breakdown and needed help, From My Family, I was the one who ended up making the therapy appointments. I am still afraid to tell them that I was suicidal, and that I fear it will return. I know they won't help me and it hurts deeply.
Why can't we all just step up and deal with our own family? When I have a kid, if I ever have one, I will instill in them the importance of family. I will try to make them understand they can tell me anything, even if they are suicidal. I will talk to them openly about suicide, and about how telling another person will help. I will take off time from work to see if they're ok, even if they are past being teenagers... I won't just wave my hand at the problem. I won't wait for the mental breakdown. I won't wait for the attempt.
I won't deny that these feelings can exist for even my child.
The next thing that occurs to me, is that i should be the one to step up. My aunt comes to mind: she is severely insomniac and hypochondriac, and we tend to avoid her because we're scared. She needs someone to bring her outside of herself, and her husband cannot help... he's been around her for too long and works all day.
She used to paint amazing reproductions, but she stopped cold turkey years ago. I have wondered for a while now if I could help her. Should I try to come back into her life and encourage her to start again?

[healingme4me]

If you desire reaching out to her, just do so recognizing she may not respond the way you hope, but imo, it's a sweet gesture. It's too bad your family isn't open and communicative. But you know what you need, what you want, so at least it's a goal with other non family relationships.