[iditp20]

She takes more and more on, not thinking about the repercussions it will have on our relationship.

She can have been at work for 9 hours of the day, and the first thing she does when she gets in is go on what's app to work and an app they use.

I am here feeling like a loose end, getting more and more frustrated because I will be excited for her to get home cause I haven't seen her all day, and then she can be an hour or two late and not even say she misses me. It's more like 'what's for tea' and then goes on her phone.

I feel like the commission she earns takes importance over us. But if I say anything she just denies any responsibility and some how turns it around on me. :/



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[avlady]

Sometimes i notice people when they get home from work they are wired up and need downtime. That is what it's like at my home and my husband and I agree on letting each other their time to settle into the change from being out to being in.

[iditp20]

I know, it's just that she is just never 'present' kind of :/ not to our relationship anyway.

This kind of takes all the sexual side of anything out, cause I don't feel close, and I can't just put out when expected. Sexual encounters usually end up in me getting upset because it's just expected of me when she doesn't show any romance any more :/

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[jadzea]

Give her a reason to stay off the phone when she gets home. Have some nice appetizer/snacks and maybe a drink ready for her. Have her sit down and help her take her shoes off. Put your arm around her, kiss her and tell her how much you missed her or how glad you are that she is home and you can spend time together. Cook a nice dinner together sharing laughs, hugs and a glass of wine. Take her phone away and tell her tonight is your night, not the phone's. If she likes to clean up when she gets home have heated towels and scented bath salts or body wash ready for her to use. Get some bath oil she can smooth on (or you can smooth on) after the shower or bath. Help her relax and let her know you want to be with her. If she is really into you she will get the idea. If she doesn't, you're right. She is more interested in work than you.

Good luck.

[iditp20]

The problem is that I do all of this. To the point of that she doesn't do anything in the house, she never has to cook or even make a cup tea. She doesn't have to run her own bath, I bake, I do everything. But she's more interested in the phone.

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[Crazy Hitch]

I'm sorry that she doesn't appear to be meeting you half way. And you've tried discussing this with her before and she's just swung the bat around on to you. You seem to do an incredible amount for her, and maybe, just maybe, she actually takes advantage of this, because she knows you will just do it.

[iditp20]

I am going to stop, I don't think there's any other way of dealing with it.

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[alk2601]

My opinion isn't worth beans, but it does sound to me like she's not willing to meet you halfway. You deserve to feel loved and appreciated by your partner. It's okay to want more time with her and to want her to show you that she cares for you. If she's not even trying listen to and meet your needs, maybe you should stop trying to meet hers.

[BenAztrow]

You just hope for the best because there are no more options

[iditp20]

I agree, I talked about it to her, and she's took on another 16 hours overtime. She doesn't need the money.

I can't even talk to her about it because she will say that she has to work etc... it's getting too much for me to handle, how can she be so cold to me? It's like 'i love you' stops doing the job when someones not here to show it :/ barely ever.