[nelli123]

I really need clarification on this matter: about few years ago I met this mental health professional, who shortly became my very close friend, giving me advises on personal issues, such as not to pursue my engagement and marriage with fiancee because I already knew then I will not be happy with him. Later on, that friend became my mentor, mentoring me through grad school and proofreading my papers since english is not my native language. Occasionally I would notice sexual context in his interactions with me and complimenting my appearance and stating that Im a very good woman. However, he was also in cohabiting relationships with a younger GF from Latin America. They have been cohabiting for two decades and per him, he did not believe in marriage. He was married previously and had children from his ex wife. Due to the lack of close friends, I became very attached to him and he continued to advise me in my professional life. We were texting each other daily. I initiated contacts, and when he didn't respond fast enough, I became angry and we would fight. In one of these fights I called him "bottom feeder" due to the fact that he was cohabiting for decades with uneducated loud lady, who simply used him for a money. We stopped contact,I apologized, and we began talking again. He stated he was interested in building good relationships with me. But…after yet another argument he disappeared. I tried to contact him several times to no success, even regarding professional advise. However, last week he replied and stated he can only try to help me professionally because he became CEO of the hospital. I told him it means he has no desire to help me. He advised me to go to psychotherapy and stop contacting him because I literally bombarded him with texts and emails. I don't know how to ease up this pain of rejection and hurt. I trusted him with everything and depended on him and its difficult for me to trust people. How to cope with this betrayal? He himself is a psychologist, btw.

[Rose76]

Do yourself a favor and stop contacting him. Also, find yourself some friends. This guy is not "interested in building good relationships." Time will ease all your pain over being rejected by him.

His marriage ended in divorce. His 20 year relationship with recent GF was going nowhere. He was hitting on you, despite cohabiting with someone else. No, this is not a guy who forms good relationships with anyone. Don't take it personal. You're looking for something from him that he doesn't have to give.

[nelli123]

Thank you for your input, Rose! You are correct, this person is incapable of relationships; merely looking for whats convenient for him and easy to manipulate. It's difficult without support system, but I can't keep on thinking about past. I will do whatever it takes to get out there and live my life. I need to learn how to chose my contacts wisely and set boundaries!Happy holidays!