[noname0001]

Hi. I know it is strange but this is the situation. When i was in the high school i really liked one girl but i had serious problems with my family and i couldn't do anything. Actually I couldn't imagine having a gf in this time because the problems with my family were really serious and they would ruin everything and i guess she would find how crazy my family is. When i graduate and move to university she deleted her facebook account and I lost any connection with her. One year ago I found that she has a facebook account again but I didn't contact her because I understood that it passed so much time. But i realized that she is my first real love and two weeks ago i sent her a message and ask her if she still remembers me to go out with me for a cup of coffee. I waited one week but there wasn't an answer and than sent another message but there is still no answer. I couldn't see her pictures with a bf but i guess she has one who is an old high school make of her. So what should I do? I can't forget her for so many years. How to explain this silence from her? She can answer me that she has a bf or don;t remember me or something like that but i can't explain when she doesn't replay.

[CANDC]

Welcome noname to Psych Central, You have a common problem that many people have. Finding that person that would be just right. Sometimes people change. Maybe she is not following her facebook account.

Patience while still honing your relationship skills with other people could keep you in good skills should she notice you are available.

Many other forums and articles here.

There is not much you can do you all ready sent her two messages , it's up to her if she writes back .
I tried to write to an old friend from HS and it flat lined , people change over the years .
I hope you hear from her but if you don't then just cherish the time you had .

[divine1966]

if you guys didnt keep in touch and have no particular ties to each other she is under no obligation to reply. she might not care to do that, not like you two are best friends. i would try to forget

[ptangptang]

Yep twice is enough. Don't pester her. Just forget about her and get on with your life.

[noname0001]

Thank you for the answers but i think i will write her for the last time and than probably will give up.

[8thstreetbungalow]

3 unwanted messages = harrassment.

Don't be like me and get convicted. Cops say if she doesn't respond that is insentive they are unwanted.

[noname0001]

I know but for me the worst answer will be much better than no answer. I just can't accept this silence and I can't explain what is so difficult to answer that she has a serious bf or she doesn't remember me any more or anything else. actually i desperately need this answer so i can go ahead and forger her. Now i'm wondering what is in her head i am completely sure she remembers and maybe she is angry because i didn't do anything so many years like a coward but i really had a reason that i used to hide and i'm still hiding.

[8thstreetbungalow]

This is time for a councelor and to seek out therapy. This is unhealthy.

*knows from expierence*

[divine1966]

I agree it is unhealthy. Time for professional help. She isn't a friend or a lover that you need to get over. Just a crush, either let it go or please seek help

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Parley]

if you insist on contacting her again~ request her as a friend because the email could be going into the spam folder. if she doesn't respond~ you will know for sure.

[winter4me]

Originally Posted by noname0001

I know but for me the worst answer will be much better than no answer. I just can't accept this silence and I can't explain what is so difficult to answer that she has a serious bf or she doesn't remember me any more or anything else. actually i desperately need this answer so i can go ahead and forger her. Now i'm wondering what is in her head i am completely sure she remembers and maybe she is angry because i didn't do anything so many years like a coward but i really had a reason that i used to hide and i'm still hiding.

This might hurt but......depending on how long ago and how you two interacted if at all, she may not even recall.......let it go. The relationship you had was as imagined in your head---we all do that sometimes---it really has nothing to do with her as you did not have a relationship. Shed a tear, move on. Sometimes, there are no answers to be given.

[Slamjammer]

Her SILENCE is her message to you. She has moved on, and you need to as well.

Don't become a stalker and make a total *** of yourself.

Good luck to you.

[8thstreetbungalow]

Being obessive and sending messages doesn't make you a stalker. it just makes you a harrasser. Just some knowledge bombs so you understand better, people seem to have that misconception. (this is directed at noname since there is such a stigma to a topic like this).

harrassing is bad too. Please be careful here and be smart.