I don't know what to do about my sister...

There have been times (not recently) when I have talked about my oldest sister on PC. She and her husband were my legal guardians for the last two years of high school, and there was a lot of emotional, religious, and verbal abuse---although, having been raised by a dysfunctional and crazy mother, I did not realize for years that I was being abused. For years, I kept making excuses for them. In fact, they even adopted my first born baby (she's now almost 30 and has alcohol fetal syndrome).

Anyway, I've seen a lot of bizarre behavior from my sister over the years (long story) and i kept ignoring it and excusing it. In the last year or so, I started thinking that there might be some mental illness going. And lately it's getting really bad. My niece/daughter ("L") cannot live alone so she still lives with my sister. Well, lately, Sis has been doing things like barging into L's room at about 3 in the morning, almost every morning and tearing up her room looking for drugs. She takes her cell phone from her several times a day to see if she's been calling boys. One time recently, sis was painting the laundry room and just suddenly stopped in the middle of it, and without saying a word, went upstairs and went to bed and left a big mess. L knew my sister had been having a rough time lately, so she went and finished up the painting, and cleaned up. Well, my sister came down just as L was finishing and flew into a rage and had a meltdown. L ended up calling me wanting us to come over because my sis was scaring her. L was sobbing hysterically and said she was afraid that sis was gonna hurt herself. So me and my two other grown kids (19 and 27) went over. My sister was in the corner, crying hysterically, rocking back and forth, and mumbling incoherently.

Wow! Your sister definitely has issues, though it's unclear exactly what they might be- I'm guessing bipolar related though. You should try to talk to her- maybe yourself and other family members- say that you are worried about her and think she should think about seeing a therapist/psychiatrist- she definitely needs t. Be gentle- I know, depending on your upbringing and locale, the thought of seeing a p doc is often seen in a negative sense. There's nothing to be ashamed about- try and help her see that. Good luck with it all.

In some states if a social worker and a psychiatrist decide someone should be hospitalized for 30 days, it is possible.

It sounds like your niece daughter is in danger of being abused mentally and emotionally. Is there anything you could do to provide a safe haven for her or help her find a safe place to be?

The picture you describe of your sister sounds like someone who needs professional help.

In many states the state police will bring someone to a psych hospital if they are a danger to themselves or others.

I know there may have already been some abuse. I know of one particular incident. This is a bit triggering. My sister and BIL adopted three boys and one of them was sexually abusing my daughter/niece for a long time. My sister did go to the authorities, but there was some loop hole because of them being so close in age, so he didn't get arrested () but my sister was also told that, if my nephew was allowed to stay in the home, that L would be taken away. My sister actually had to think about it! She didn't want to lose her son's love. Someone had to practically to force her hand. I did not know about that for years! Her other two (adopted) brothers were verbally abusive to her and bullied her a lot, and they were allowed to get away with it because they "were boys."

now my sister is spreading lies about my daughter