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Old Jun 13, 2015, 04:18 PM
detour1 detour1 is offline
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Member Since: Dec 2014
Location: Rutland ma
Posts: 410
Hi yesterday me him ,and the school counselor met together. First the counselor met with me to tell me the change that next school year he only wants to be friendly ,not build a friendship up anymore I had a hard time adjusting to this ,I (basically) have autism but not totally. it took me about 2 hours to calm down. The counselor says he wants to meet together and tell me this. So we met and the counselor asked us where we wants to go with this ,Then he asked him before me and he says friendly I guess ,and then she asked me ,which I was scared to answered I friendly i guess too,i wanted to be friends but the words could not come out. Then the counselor explains what friendly is. So he told me what he wanted ,like i cannot walk to classes anymore ,or sit with him. so i was a very upset ,and the counselor help me express my feelings. Then after a while ,he had to tell me what he thinks of me and he says your cool ,a nice person and its fun getting to know you a little. i had a little smile on my face and then a while later he changed his mind ,he says i could sit with him mon ,and fri at school and still walk him to class. Then he put his arms out and we gave a hug. So then he left and the counselor talked to me and says i think he felt bad and it was nice of him to do that. Then later that day ,i was walking to the bus and he ran to me and we walked together. Btw we are both males. I am not sure i feel kind of guilty ,not sure what to do
Maybe he has a crush on me
Hugs from:
unaluna

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  #2  
Old Jun 14, 2015, 01:51 PM
Bill3 Bill3 is offline
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Member Since: Mar 2009
Location: USA
Posts: 10,966
What else did the counselor say?
  #3  
Old Jun 14, 2015, 02:33 PM
llleeelllaaannneee's Avatar
llleeelllaaannneee llleeelllaaannneee is offline
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Member Since: Mar 2015
Location: seattle
Posts: 112
In an earlier post you wrote...

"Hi we both have are issues and my is giving personal space and his is setting limits with people. I met him at school and she set this plan up when i can sit with him and talk to me. and if i go over the limit he would try to tell me. and we i guess helped each other out this school year. Far as i know he is not autistic"

I hear that you have challenges with recognizing other's boundaries and this person has challenges with having boundaries with other people.

We can never know how other people truly feel or what they truly think. Heck, it's hard enough to know how I truly feel or what I truly think about many things in life!

I think that it may help if you understand boundaries in general better. There is a lot online to read if you just google 'boundaries'. It's really helped me to read about boundaries and I do it often to remind myself and learn more.

Relationships take time and rushing things can add to confusion and hurt feelings. Giving this person the space to come to you may help. I can't possibly know for sure but I think this person may have approached you after you met with the counselor because you showed willingness to respect their boundaries.

Relationships are two sided. Just thinking and caring about someone and wanting to know them is nice but it doesn't necessarily make for a good relationship.

I believe we can focus so much on the other person that we actually become selfish. Like, if I'm so focused on how someone feels about me I'm not interested in them as a whole person I'm only interested in them in relation to me. If I'm focused on how they act towards me and less on how I act towards them then I am looking to them to satisfy my needs and wants rather than to have a mutual friendship.

Idk if that's helpful but it's my thoughts on the matter. Hope you feel better about the situation soon
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