[festidump]

My depression is manifesting itself as anger. My husband and daughter are constantly telling me this and point out everything that I do that is done in anger. All I do is switch off and hide behind a wall and all their advice and suggestions runs off like water, non of it goes in.

If I open up, I just don´t feel that they understand anything about me and when they ask me questions my answers just don´t make sense to them which, in turn, fuels my anger as I feel more alone than ever when I open up and ask for help.

Has anyone here successfully found a way of communicating needs from depression to their family without ending up enraged and walling themselves away? Don´t know if I´ve explained myself properly here...

[metdavidson]

Originally Posted by festidump

My depression is manifesting itself as anger. My husband and daughter are constantly telling me this and point out everything that I do that is done in anger. All I do is switch off and hide behind a wall and all their advice and suggestions runs off like water, non of it goes in.

If I open up, I just don´t feel that they understand anything about me and when they ask me questions my answers just don´t make sense to them which, in turn, fuels my anger as I feel more alone than ever when I open up and ask for help.

Has anyone here successfully found a way of communicating needs from depression to their family without ending up enraged and walling themselves away? Don´t know if I´ve explained myself properly here...

If you are depressed and things are not going better, try to consult a psychologist. It is very great that your family is concerned about your emotional health, try to open and to discuss your problem ones again. Anger can kill your relationships and it will be hard to return everything back...

[iwonderaboutstuff]

Depression manifesting as anger? Interesting.

Can't imagine severe depression (been there) manifesting as anger.

A specific example or two of the kind of interactions you're having will help. Without that, I wonder if you're trying to explain to them how you feel (i.e. what it means to be depressed), and not having been depressed / having no reference point, they aren't getting it and that's frustrating, which comes out like anger. If you want them to understand your feelings, you have to start with something you know they already understand, then go from there. Not sure if that makes sense... but as an example, imagine Columbus trying to tell someone the world isn't flat, it's round and the person he's talking to doesn't know what round means. There's no reference point. So, to teach them round he needs to use something they already understand. Like holding up a piece of paper (flat), then an orange (round).

In terms of communicating needs - be specific. For example, I'm having a bad day and a hug would make me feel better. I can't seem to focus on anything, would you help me remember to do X.

[festidump]

Originally Posted by iwonderaboutstuff

Depression manifesting as anger? Interesting.

Can't imagine severe depression (been there) manifesting as anger.

A specific example or two of the kind of interactions you're having will help. Without that, I wonder if you're trying to explain to them how you feel (i.e. what it means to be depressed), and not having been depressed / having no reference point, they aren't getting it and that's frustrating, which comes out like anger..

I think a well as frustration I´m feeling resentment that they "don´t" help me when I´m low. At the moment I´m feeling ok and can accept that they do try everything in their power to help me but they just don´t know how to help me when I´m feeling low and can´t motivate myself to get out of bed for hours at a time and just lie there and cry. I´m trying to understand what going on and not sure how to but the idea of frustration turning to anger has made me think about resentment as they have no reference point.

Thanks for helping me. I hate feeling angry and want to understand why I feel that way a lot of the time. I have my first appointment with a therapist in 20 years on Monday, I´m a little scared but trying to understand and make a change.