[Artchic528]

I like fashion dolls and always have. My favorite right now is Ever After High. My mother just keeps on me about how I really shouldn't be buying them as I am either too old or can't afford them. She also says I can't have anymore pet hamsters just because she doesn't particularly care for them. I know I am sounding like a kid right now, I am actually 32, but I just wish that people around me took more interest in the things I like. It would help me feel more....I dunno, loved and cared for or something.

[A Red Panda]

It sucks when it is hard to find people who share similar interests.

As to your title "why won't people appreciate my interests?" Well... that's sort of easy. They don't have to. They have their own interests and no obligation to... appreciate? yours. I don't really even know what you want as appreciation.

Your mom does have a point though, about the dolls - you're 32, living at home. You really can't afford too much in regards to collections, and I'm sure you don't have that much space in your bedroom! And, well... her house, her rules - especially with pets.

I guess I see both sides. I can totally see where your mom is coming from. I can see how you might have trouble finding peers who share your interests - I'm 31 and can't imagine collecting dolls (then again! I collect rocks, lol!) but at the same time, I'm happy with my own collections. I can understand how you're feeling unloved from not being able to share your interests - I babble away about mine when the mood strikes me, and also show my friends my collections which I have displayed around in my house. They're happy for me being happy and listen to my stories (everything I collect is from places I've travelled, so there are always stories attached). I'd feel hurt if any of my friends were to respond negatively to me.

I'm sure that you can find online communities who enjoy the same things that you do. There are lots of adults who collect dolls!

[Artchic528]

I know it's her home and thus her rules. That's why I agreed to stop buying hamsters. It's just that she sometimes says things to me like, "Is that rodent close to dying yet?" and it hurts because not only do I love my current hamster, but she is going to be my last one for a while. My hamster is my therapy animal in a way and brings me great comfort. I hate how insensitive my mom can be sometimes.

[A Red Panda]

Yeah, I totally get that! That sounds like a different topic than what you posted. I'd be really hurt if anyone said anything like that about either of my cats. If she hates them so much, how on earth did you ever acquire your first one?! (that's rhetorical, I'm just surprised that she ever let you have one in the first place if she hates them that much!)

[divine1966]

It's very insensitive of your mom to make such comments. I totally see why you feel hurt. I am sorry

Saying that I can't stand hamsters and wouldn't allow one in my house. In fact my daughter wasn't allowed to have pets while living at home. She lives on her own and now has a cat. We are very close. She doesn't hold it against me that she wasn't allowed pets.

I don't collect dolls but my daughter collected some while in college. She also slept with stuffed animals in college. She isn't immature. Not a big deal.

Maybe your mom thinks it is wrong to spend on dolls if you still live at home and aren't supporting yourself.

I wonder if you look for groups online. Bet you there are other adults collecting dolls. Overall I think it should get easier when you are on your own. You can buy whatever you want and have pets!


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So what if you have a hobby that is considered "awkward" or "immature" for your age? I am 24 and I still watch cartoons, love Star Wars and Star Trek, play "childish" video games, and didn't stop playing Legos until I was 16 or 17 and I still have a massive Lego collection left over from those days.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with your hobbies and anybody who can't accept you for who you are doesn't deserve to have you in their life. Period. Embrace your interests and pride yourself on being a unique individual. Most people are too content on trying to blend in even if it means quitting what they enjoy for the sake of being "normal". You're a cut above many just for having your own hobbies that you enjoy regardless of how "weird" they might appear to others. Keep on trucking!

With that being said, I can understand the whole pet thing if you still live in your mother's house but that still doesn't excuse her insensitive comments about your hamster.

[Onward2wards]

This may sound a bit odd coming from a 48 year old guy, but ... Star Wars figures and Monster High dolls are really, really cool. I don't own any, I just find them entertaining when I'm in stores.

[healingme4me]

The things people collect, nothing unusual, whatsoever about a doll collection.

Sorry to hear your mum was snide about your hampster, no need to wish ill on a living creature.

How much longer, that you'll need to stay there, with her?

'current hamster' - so when you say "more hamsters" are you referring to having multiple hamsters at a time or one after another?

I think I stand with mom on this one. The immaturity to me doesn't lay with collecting dolls rather it comes from you not being responsible. You should be contributing to the household you live in ~ before ~ spending frivolous money on yourself. It is wonderful that mom support you during your time of need but I think perhaps you are taking advantage of her. Call me stern though. Afterall, I expected my kids to pay rent or move out at 18.

[Artchic528]

Originally Posted by rcat

'current hamster' - so when you say "more hamsters" are you referring to having multiple hamsters at a time or one after another?

Both. I had no more than three at once though. Two dwarves and a teddy bear.

[Artchic528]

Just wanted to say thanks to all who posted their advice , thanks and hugs. I have since started a social group for those, like me, who like Ever After and Monster High dolls.

http://forums.psychcentral.com/group...tors-club.html

[A Red Panda]

You know, I was bored the other day and watched all of the Monster High cartoons on netflix. hahaha. I do rather enjoy cartoons sometimes, and I was way too exhausted to be able to handle any show with depth to it! It was a pretty cute cartoon.

[Artchic528]

I am glad you like it Panda. Ever After High is similar but uses fairytales instead of monsters.

[I'm Worth It]

Originally Posted by Artchic528

I like fashion dolls and always have. My favorite right now is Ever After High. My mother just keeps on me about how I really shouldn't be buying them as I am either too old or can't afford them. She also says I can't have anymore pet hamsters just because she doesn't particularly care for them. I know I am sounding like a kid right now, I am actually 32, but I just wish that people around me took more interest in the things I like. It would help me feel more....I dunno, loved and cared for or something.

You have those things and that is about loving and caring for yourself. That is what people do for themselves so they don't have to rely on others for all of their needs. If you can't afford them, however, you are not loving yourself properly either. Doing things for yourself that cause you to negate or sacrifice other things, like bills, etc. is not healthy. If you can't afford the dolls, be happy with the ones you have and enjoy them.

If you live with your mother, you must respect her wishes about the hamsters. She apparently allowed you to have the ones you have or had, so it is not unreasonable for her to refuse to allow any more.

If you are obsessed with these things at the expense of other people or having other outside interests, that is not healthy either and your mother is doing what she should do, guide her daughter to a healthier emotional state and sense of well being.

[Artchic528]

Originally Posted by I'm Worth It

You have those things and that is about loving and caring for yourself. That is what people do for themselves so they don't have to rely on others for all of their needs. If you can't afford them, however, you are not loving yourself properly either. Doing things for yourself that cause you to negate or sacrifice other things, like bills, etc. is not healthy. If you can't afford the dolls, be happy with the ones you have and enjoy them.

If you live with your mother, you must respect her wishes about the hamsters. She apparently allowed you to have the ones you have or had, so it is not unreasonable for her to refuse to allow any more.

If you are obsessed with these things at the expense of other people or having other outside interests, that is not healthy either and your mother is doing what she should do, guide her daughter to a healthier emotional state and sense of well being.

I agree about respecting her wishes to no longer keep hamsters. That is why I am not going to buy any more after my current one passes away. She has valid concerns regarding my ability to care for them, and while I care for the one I have better than most, I can see how she wants a cleaner home. However, I do wish she would at least not say the comment she had said or reworded it differently.