[Angelwngs25]

I ended our friendship between me and my friend Dandy irl we were friends for 4 years and these are our conversations on Facebook since Monday the 2nd...

*Monday*

Me: I love you Dandy but you really hurt me and I'm I try my best to be nice to you but when you said basically you don't think we can be friends that really hurt. And I'm sorry I didn't react the way you expected me to when you said you were sorry but it's hard to believe someone that says they will be nicer to you and does the opposite of that. I love you Dandy but it hurts that you keep doing what you say you won't. I still want to be friends but if you never do what you say you will do before I come over I'm just going to give up. Again I love you and I want to be friends but the way you have been acting recently I feel like you don't really love me like you say you do. I'm trying to be less sensitive but a lot of the stuff you say to me hurts. I love you as a best friend and I don't want to lose you over something so stupid. Message me or call me if you still love me and want to be friends.

*Tuesday 11:07AM*

Him: it goes both ways,everything IS NOT about u..if u respected this friendship u would have listened when i messaged u the night of the fire when i said i didnt want anybody around me..instead u made it about u..lets take a friendship break..in a month or so maybe we can meet for lunch somewhere & see how that turns out..and u can pay for yourself,because that is also getting old..make some changes where u have money or stay home & do nothing..

Me: You haven't had to pay for my food for a while. The last two times we have gone to culver's you had a coupon for buy one get one free so you didn't have to pay for my food at all so don't even pull that.

Him: yes,& u even were sarcastic about going there because u wanted nasty tacos at jack in your crack

Me: Why would I be sarcastic about going there I love culver's.

Him: i'll see u in a month,take care

Me: You too Dandy. Message me or call me when you want to hang out again.

*Tuesday 3:02PM*

I called him and he didn't answer then he took the phone off the hook then I sent him this message on Facebook...

Me: Dandy please talk to me. I wanted to say I'm sorry I don't take your jokes very well and that I will try and not get mad at you when I see you and you are joking. Please at least call me and talk to me about it at least.

Him: lets let some time pass..i also went off on kim..i need time by myself..lah-hoo

Me: Lah hoo. Can I at least see you on your birthday so I can at least show how much I care about you by making you a birthday cake?

Him: i'll be dead by then
lol

Me: No you won't

Hey the admins kicked me off of the team because I was really hurt that I was going to lose my best friend (you) and now I'm hurting even more. I left the group and blocked them all.

Him: how dramatic

Me: How am I dramatic?

Him: i said let some time pass,u are obsessive...

Me: No I am not.

Time wouldn't have to pass if you really cared about me.

Him: u do not respect me,if u did u wouldnt be bothering me
a very tramatic thing happened here,its not about u

Me: What tramatic thing?

Him: um,kitty died...a fire
figure out a way to be up johns *** everyday..its not my problem u dont live together
what happens when i'm in a relationship?...are u gonna kidnap him & stalk me?...lol

Me: You need serious help Dandy. You always accuse me of being some way that I am not. We are supposed to be best friends Dandy and best friends spend quite a bit of time together.

Him: i joke,i kid around, & i dont need help..if u RESPECTED me,u would give me time alone like i asked...

THIS IS WHEN I ENDED THE FRIENDSHIP IN REAL LIFE...

Me: This is the last bit of communication you are going to hear from me for a while if ever again. Let me know when you want to have me bring your book by or when you want to come pick it up from me. This is the second time in our friendship you want me to leave you alone and not talk to me for a month or more. I am not going to put up with this love hate relationship that has been going on for a our entire relationship. You were way different before you left Missouri Breaks. Since you moved to the new apartment you have been way different. I refuse to let you keep hurting me over and over and over. I love you Dandy and I always will but I am not going to keep getting hurt from you over and over and over and keep giving you a month without me because this is the second time you have needed a break from me like I'm the ****ed up one. If you decide to have respect for the relationship we had you can call me. I'd rather deal with you on Facebook from now on. I can not deal with you in person anymore. I love you and if you ever decide to have respect for me the person who always loved you no matter what you know where I live and since I am getting a new phone soon I'll give you John's phone number and my home phone number if you ever decide to be respectful in our relationship that you want again. John's number is(***)***-**** and my home phone is (***)***-**** if that home number doesn't work call John's his number won't change. I love you Dandy very much and you will always be in my heart. But I refuse to let you hurt me any longer. You think it's a joke to call me a stalker and say other things like I'm obsessed with you that are supposed to be jokes. Calling me all those things shows me you have no respect for our friendship. I'm sick of loving you and getting the opposite of love in return. I still lah-hoo and I will always lah-hoo. Bye Dandy you were the bestest friend I ever had at times but too many times you weren't this is goodbye. I love you, I hope you find happyness someday.

*Thursday*

Him: did u block me?

Me: No, why would I block you? I still hope we can have a healthy relationship some day. And if I blocked you, you wouldn't be able to message me.

Him: why cant i comment on your posts?
helloooooooooooooooooooo
& u wonder why i get irritated..u cant even respond...unreal

why cant i comment on ur posts????????????????????

Me: I'm in a damn movie Dandy. I don't know why?

Him: huh

Me: What does huh mean?

Him: movie?..wtf are u talking about

Me: I'm with Casey, Josef and Michelle watching The Martian at Harkins Christown 14.

Him: at a movie,not in....

Me: What do you mean a movie not in?

Him: ur at a movie..u said u were in a movie...
like an actress
lol

Me: Lol...your funny. I thought you agreed we wouldn't be friends.

Him: no i didnt..looks like u broadcasted a bunch of lies to your friends,i asked u not to..
& why cant i comment on ur posts??...3rd time i asked

Me: I don't know, I already told you. Maybe it's because we're not friends on Facebook.

Him: then accept the request

Me: Why should I add you back? You unfriended me. I know you that usually means you don't want to be my friend. If I add you your probably just going to make a rude comment and make me look bad.

Him: dont bother...
i said i needed a break,u were ****ing rude & made it about u with fire & kitty dying...
grow the **** up

Me: You are the one that needs to grow the **** up. You are mad at me for wanting to be there for you in your time of need. Therefore your the one with the problems.

Him: no,that would be u...
i dont need u..
if u were decent u would talk,instead your an asshole,making me to be the badguy

Me: I am talking to you Dandy.

Him: if u cant accept request,go to hell

Me: I can't find the friend request.

Him: oh
idk,i cant either
request me?
lah hoo

Me: You happy now? And I'm not going to put up with verbal abuse online.

Him: u just put a rude comment..dont threaten me...i'm not putting up with your **** either
no wonder your mother didnt take u in when homeless,your a rude person
the world does not bow to u

Me: What rude comment?

Him: um,when u said who the **** are u...how rude
to trenyan

Me: I am not friends with that person so I was wondering who in the world that was and why they can see my posts?

Him: i shared the pic...
i am friends

Me: Oh I didn't realize that, I thought they were commenting on my post...sorry.

(Last message I sent him)

If your going to post rude comments to me about how I'm dramatic and message and when I don't answer blow up my Facebook when you have no idea what I'm doing I might be busy then I'm not going to be friends with you.

Should I even bother being friends with this guy on Facebook? I mean he told me that if I didn't accept the request to "GO TO HELL". I mean what does everyone here think? I honestly don't even know why I decided to add him back to stay friends on Facebook all he is going to do is start **** with me on Facebook...Oh, and does anyone think maybe he has more problems than just anxiety? Cuz he told me once that that's all he has and he's on SSDI too like me. I'm pretty sure they don't give people with just anxiety problems SSDI.

Honestly this was tldr. Some things should be kept private... How would this person feel having their Facebook conversation posted here?
That being said, I would never be friends with someone on Facebook that I wouldn't IRL.
Good Luck

[*Laurie*]

I don't like to have anyone on my Facebook that causes me stress.

[Gavinandnikki]

Wow. Neither one of you are acting like adults. Amazing.

This is way too much information.

This is also very immature and childish.

Facebook and social media is not the real world and you have FAR to much invested in it. I personally would never be 'friends' with someone I would never carry the same sort of friendhsip in real life. I would end this FB relationship because it would be unhealthy to have it offline.

By the way, I found this really difficult to read. Far too much information when a summary could have accomplished the same detail. I also agree with an above poster that this was incredibly unfair to the 'friend' you speak of. This should have been kept private. It would make me incredibly uncomfortable to know one of my social media friends was logging onto and storing our conversations.

[unaluna]

He asked you to leave him alone for a month. You wouldnt leave him alone for a day. Neither of you are being very good friends to each other Right now. Take a break from each other. Like they say, "if you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, its yours forever. If it doesnt come back, it was never truly yours in the first place".

[Trippin2.0]

Is this supposed to be a conversation between 2 adults???


Sounds like children with very filthy mouths....


From my personal experience, in all probability that convo would never had escalated the way it did had you simply complied with his request for space. Instead you attempted to force your idea of support on him. In case you're unaware, for some people space is a form of support...


Him? Not winning any brownie points in the friendship arena either.


I'm with Unaluna, you two need to stay away from each other if not for good, then for a good long while. This is not healthy.


It doesn't matter whether we think he has more than anxiety, that's quite irrelevant as this conversation is about a serious lack of boundaries and respect, not dxs.

[divine1966]

Wow. Sounds very high school to me. Not adult conversation, so much profanity and rudeness and repeating same thing. And why are you posting it here? It violates his privacy.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[divine1966]

And aren't you getting married this month? And getting a job? Did you get that job you applied for? Why obsessing over this guy and having such conversations with people when you could focus on your marriage/wedding and getting/keeping a job. This conversation sounds like huge waste of time and energy

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[ChipperMonkey]

Originally Posted by LauraBeth

I don't like to have anyone on my Facebook that causes me stress.

Ditto.

I unfriended an actual friend because she was bringing drama onto my Wall (this was awhile ago, obviously, lol). She took offense and pretty much pouted, threw a fit, blah, blah, blah.

Uhm, right.....so my options were to either A) keep her as a friend and let her abuse me on my own page! ~or~ B) totally abandon her as a friend. There was no in between....she never gave me an option to be her friend without making it "official" on Facebook.

Like I said, drama-rama. I don' t need this stuff!

I recently deactivated my FB account. Its just a breeding ground for drama. Unfortunately, I seem to find drama on other socializing sites as well.


But back to you....

I think you should give him the time he requests to be alone. If I was your friend, I would have said "adios!" to you for not giving me space. (This is a boundary issue, and if you can't respect his boundaries, you have no business being his friend....regardless of what he's done to you in the past.)

After a month or so, revisit the friendship and see if its something you both want to pursue.

I think time apart could do the both of you some good.

Have you thought about seeing a therapist? I bet it would help you in a lot of areas of your life.

[scorpiosis37]

He asked you to leave him alone for a month several times and you disrespected him by continuing to contact him. You need to respect his wish and give him some alone time and breathing room.

[Steiner of Thule]

I don't really get it.

too much information
childish and immature
lack of respect for other individual's wishes
very poor respect for their privacy
disrespectful to fiance
very questionable considering you are in a relationship
questionable time and investment in the online relationship

Yes I sound harsh but this needs to be said

[Patriots Fan]

Was this poster looking for someone to validate this? So glad I am not on FB.

[healingme4me]

Originally Posted by Angelwngs25

.

Should I even bother being friends with this guy on Facebook?

Oh, and does anyone think maybe he has more problems than just anxiety?

My opinion: No and who knows, not here to diagnose others..

[healingme4me]

Originally Posted by Patriots Fan

Was this poster looking for someone to validate this? So glad I am not on FB.

I don't believe she's looking for validation. She asked two questions. So, she bared all.

I'm a lot put off by this reaction enough to want to uninstall my tapatalk and take a very long hiatus, to be honest...regardless. isn't there a better way to guide?

[Patriots Fan]

Originally Posted by healingme4me

I don't believe she's looking for validation. She asked two questions. So, she bared all.

I'm a lot put off by this reaction enough to want to uninstall my tapatalk and take a very long hiatus, to be honest...regardless. isn't there a better way to guide?

I am sorry if you are offended by my response. I believe there were responses more harsh than mine. No offense intended.

Originally Posted by healingme4me

I don't believe she's looking for validation. She asked two questions. So, she bared all.

I'm a lot put off by this reaction enough to want to uninstall my tapatalk and take a very long hiatus, to be honest...regardless. isn't there a better way to guide?

Sometimes blunt is the only way. Maybe you could show us