[Tkdman1990]

Ok so long story I'm 25 and my fiance is 35 and we have been together for a little over two years. She has a teenage daughter who absolutely hates me.

So we have had many ups and downs in our relationship one of the biggest is her constant insecurity with her age and appearance that she always thinks I might be cheating so as foolish as this sounds I asked her to marry me this past February in hopes it would help our relationship as I really wanted it to work shortly after we found out she was pregnant. Unfortunately we had a miscarriage fairly late in the first trimester which has caused a large trife in our relationship so I decided that maybe it was time to call it quits. But now I find out she's pregnant again and I don't want to abandon my child or a pregnant woman but I'm very unhappy in my relationship.

Honest real suggestions. I know that a lot of you will say suck it up and make it work but should our child be raised in a home with two people who aren't actually in love or even miserable with one another.

[hvert]

I grew up with parents who didn't want to be married to each other and it wasn't great. You can be a father without being a husband if that's what you need to do.

What's making you unhappy? Her insecurity and jealousy? If she resolved those problems, would it be okay?

[ChipperMonkey]

Break up but support the child. Staying together will make things hellacious for that unborn child.

Oh, and make sure it's yours before paying a dime in support.

[cakeladie]

I would break up but support the child. If you stay with her the fighting and arguing will hurt the child. Being apart and seeing both happy in the end will help the child.

Not knowing her or you I kinda think she got pregnant on purpose kinda to hold you in the relationship. I could be wrong but it's a though.

Relationships take work a lot of work

Good luck

[popuri88]

Believe me, every kid would rather have divorced parents than an unstable/bitter situation at home. Your relationship with your kid is yours and your kid's only.

And yeah, it's weird that she got pregnant twice knowing your relationship was going through the bumpy road. Were you planning to to have kids before?

I could say something like "consider if it's really a lost case", but I don't really see a point as you didn't mention any hopes or wishes towards it. Sometimes you've got to do what you've got to do, that's how you feel and you can't go on with this anymore.

I spent 8 years in a relationship because I had gotten preganant. It did no one a favour - especially the two children than were the product of the relationship. I did everything to be the woman he wanted me to me and make the relationship work. Unfortunately it was plainly obvious he neither loved me nor wanted to be with me. The resentment grew until the point he himself gave up and grew increasingly hateful and eventually quite emotionally absuive.

Do NOT allow your life or those of your girlfriend and child to degenerate into that. You owe it to her and the coming baby to give them a chance for stability and the potential for (another) love in their life.

I agree that the best decision is support this little family from afar and break off the relationship.