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  #1  
Old Jan 26, 2016, 02:05 PM
Kocsisks Kocsisks is offline
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Member Since: Jan 2016
Location: Hamilton
Posts: 76
Well the title of this post says it all. I am a 30 year old old woman who has been in a relationship with a 35 year old man for almost 4 months. I have been recently diagnosed with bipolar 2 disorder. I feel like my symptoms continue to get worse and worse. I know that I have been clingy and needy to him and I do not mean to be. I constantly want reassurance that he loves me, he misses me, that he is happy with me, and that he wants to be with me. Lately I have been obsessing over sex, I can't stop thinking about it. Slowly his sex drive has went down to now he doesn't want to have sex at all. He is going through a lot of things as well and has been sick a lot. He has some mental health issues as well with anxiety, depression, and PTSD, so thank goodness he is very understanding with my issues. But I have been pushing him away with my constant need of reassurance and constantly over-analyzing things. We discussed our relationship and due to him having so much going on right now with work and school, he only wants to see me on the weekends. Did I mention we live an hour apart? Yeah that is another reason he said that we should only see each other on the weekends because he is so tired throughout the week. I am completely fine with this because I really need to work on myself and self esteem. I have been doing good giving him is space now and not texting him as much. Also not needing constant reassurance. But it's only been a couple days since I started doing this. But I constantly worry he is going to leave me and I do not know why?!! It is like I get it into my head and constantly worry about it. I have not said anything to him about this the past couple days but it is still there nibbling at my mind. I don't really know what to do to stop this worrying so much and just trust and believe him that he loves me.
Hugs from:
Bill3, JustJenny

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  #2  
Old Jan 27, 2016, 02:59 AM
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JustJenny JustJenny is offline
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Location: Europe
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Did you make any plans for the future? That you will move in together at some point or anything like that?
  #3  
Old Jan 27, 2016, 04:23 AM
Pepi Pepi is offline
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Member Since: Jan 2016
Location: Bulgaria
Posts: 46
Why do you think he might leave you? It sounds to me that you might have low self-esteem and are constantly thinking that you will never be enough or good for him. I know this because I've experienced it. You're constantly on the verge of thinking that you have to be perfect emotionally and physically in order to be desired/loved.
  #4  
Old Jan 27, 2016, 06:44 AM
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divine1966 divine1966 is offline
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Member Since: Dec 2014
Location: US
Posts: 23,235
Well couple of things are concerning. He doesn't want sex and you've been only dating 4 months. He already doesn't want it?

Seeing only on the weekends is ok but maybe one quick date middle of the week? My fiancée and I lived an hour apart before engagement too ( live together now), it is manageable.

In my experience in the past I felt needy and anxious when deep inside i knew the relationship was wrong and there was no future. I don't feel anxious and needy when things are good.

You might not be pushing him away but rather feeling that he isn't 100% available, emotionally and actually physically too (at 35 no sex?) Bet you would have no need to text all the time and be needy if he was 100% into you the way you want it

Listen to your guts.

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Last edited by divine1966; Jan 27, 2016 at 07:05 AM.
Thanks for this!
healingme4me
  #5  
Old Jan 29, 2016, 05:22 AM
jbuttz jbuttz is offline
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Member Since: Dec 2015
Location: Canada
Posts: 278
Cheer up sweet heart. Do you suspect infidelity? Sometimes I start thinking negatively and I just need to take a breather. I enjoy looking at the city lights. Try going for a walk
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