[Katieissweet]

Has anyone been rejected because of their race? I just read this :

"The one black girl i thought was attracted didnt have the facial features i liked but she was sweet as pie and real down to earth which made me forget about the rest. I was more attracted to her personality than her looks. In all honesty is she had white features i would have pursued it. It has nothing to do with her skin color, its the other features im not attracted too.

Also idk how anyone can say there is isnt a average black girl appearance. There is an average appearance for almost every race. Blacks have dominant features that stand out just like asians do. The same reason im not attracted to black girls is the same reason im not attracted to asian girls. The features of there race just dont appeal to me"

Im almost 99 percent sure if I had been white,I would not have been rejected like I was recently.Im only half white,but I don't know any ethnic people.

Anyway how do you cope with it? chances of finding mixed race boys are not high,and white boys quite understandably want to date white girls.

White guys do you find these mixed girls attractive
https://www.pinterest.com/brittnyejo...e-unplugged-3/ or would you be worried about what your parents etc say.

Okay well I'm not a guy so can't give you that perspective, I'm white and female, but for what it's worth this is my take/experience:

Some people care more about outer appearances than others, they have a 'type' and do stick to it. I was once told (when young) by a young man that he thought I was nice but he preferred blondes (I'm dark), fair enough, saved us both time. I don't find people who are so rigid and superficial very attractive either!

So maybe some guys only date white girls, that sounds quite rigid and superficial to me, a bit boring perhaps?

[black-roses]

Never but this guy used to called me a mexican

[Shadix]

When I was younger and randomly talking to girls in AOL chat rooms I had a girl say "bye" as soon as I told her my name. I sent her a message asking what the deal was and she asked "what is your ethnicity?" And when I answered that I was middle eastern, she said "there you go, bye". I don't remember specifically what was said next but I basically started calling her out on her blatant racism and she admitted she does not ever want to date someone from my race. This was a couple years after 9/11 I believe. More recently I was in a relationships forum where a woman was talking about a middle eastern guy who showed interest in her and started saying how she doesn't think it is a good idea to get involved with men from that ethnic group or something like that.

So yes, it is a very real thing. What sucks for me is that although I am originally middle eastern, I've lived in the U.S. all my life and I identify with American culture much more than middle eastern culture. But Americans still often look at me as an outsider.

[Katieissweet]

I really understand why people don't want to mix,date outside their race because there is major cultural differences and other reasons like preserving ones ancestral ties.
But for me who does not know any ethnic people it's difficult, I think I should probably do online dating which I have done in the past.

[s4ndm4n2006]

Originally Posted by Katieissweet

Has anyone been rejected because of their race? I just read this :

"The one black girl i thought was attracted didnt have the facial features i liked but she was sweet as pie and real down to earth which made me forget about the rest. I was more attracted to her personality than her looks. In all honesty is she had white features i would have pursued it. It has nothing to do with her skin color, its the other features im not attracted too.

Also idk how anyone can say there is isnt a average black girl appearance. There is an average appearance for almost every race. Blacks have dominant features that stand out just like asians do. The same reason im not attracted to black girls is the same reason im not attracted to asian girls. The features of there race just dont appeal to me"

Im almost 99 percent sure if I had been white,I would not have been rejected like I was recently.Im only half white,but I don't know any ethnic people.

Anyway how do you cope with it? chances of finding mixed race boys are not high,and white boys quite understandably want to date white girls.

White guys do you find these mixed girls attractive
https://www.pinterest.com/brittnyejo...e-unplugged-3/ or would you be worried about what your parents etc say.

I will be as honest as I can. Depending on how you look at it, there should not be anything to "cope" with tbh. I don't mean to sound minimizing, I do understand how this may strike you as prejudicial but can I try to elaborate?

So someone has said they are not attracted to you physically and you believe it is because of your skin color. Ask yourself, did they in any way imply that it was anything but physical appearance and if so, does not the person who chooses to date you have the right to pick who they find attractive in this way? True it still hurts to hear someone say anything about us is not attractive to them but I feel that if it had to do with anything but your skin color you might not have had as much of a problem with it. What if it was that you were too tall, too short, too thin, your breast size, hair color or any other non skin related thing? Would that not be entirely normal for them to have preferences? For this reason in the way that it was stated, they just simply are not attracted to you and if it is that they don't like black girls, so be it. I am half Japanese and don't particularly find most Asian women attractive, but that, is not a racial judgment, more of a physical appearance thing.

I think the problem lies in that the world seems to want to make everything about race and makes anything to do with race illegal to say or comment on. While I agree any judgment based on character quality or behavior related to racial things is wrong, I do believe the world has taken things so far that as soon as anything related to it is mentioned, even as it may be innocent, we automatically assume the person is being racist.

Being attracted to, or not attracted to a certain race for the physical attractiveness is natural and normal.

Dont' take it personally, they even stated they liked your personality. Thing is, it's all well and good to hope that someone will love us or just be attracted to us on personality alone but in reality that rarely happens.

[divine1966]

It doesn't appear as op was talking about herself being rejected but rather she read it somewhere. Also it doesn't seem she knows if that's why she was rejected. It is just a speculation. Recent rejection was a nurse in inpatient facility who has been avoiding her after being romantically pursued. He simply isn't allowed to be romantic with his patients regardless of their race. It isn't as much rejection as him doing his job

Now if there was another rejection I don't know but unless you know for sure you cant assume it's due to race

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[Talthybius]

Ignoring social pressure, ethnicity is about how you look physically. Whatever your ethnicity is is going to be very important for if a person is physically attracted to you or not.

I always felt that for people who are not mixed or my own ethnicity, they have to be a lot more attractive than average for me to be attracted to them.

In my ethnicity you can find the very white skin with blue/green eyes and blonde hair, to the dark brown skin with dark eyes and hair. So, you can say, my ethnicity is mixed, in a way. I'm attracted to both ends, and to any combination between the two. I'm not white, though, because you seemed to care only about white guys' opinions. If there is a cultural and language barriers, I think getting along and relating will be harder. That's at least what I like to think about me living in North America. But it seems to me, even girls from my own ethnicity and who have culture and language ties with those of mine seem to prefer white guys (as you do), if they can attract them. So, I'm not sure if this is a universal thing.

[Katieissweet]

Hehe the person I quoted wasn't directed at me its just a comment I found online,tbh im african and white,but I don't look all that black,I look like a fair Latina.
Guys who are into mixed race girls do like me.

You are half Japanese but do not like asian girls much,do you have a white mother ? Maybe that's why ? she's sort of your first love and determines things.
I have a white father,but I still like black and mixed guys.

Originally Posted by s4ndm4n2006

I will be as honest as I can. Depending on how you look at it, there should not be anything to "cope" with tbh. I don't mean to sound minimizing, I do understand how this may strike you as prejudicial but can I try to elaborate?

So someone has said they are not attracted to you physically and you believe it is because of your skin color. Ask yourself, did they in any way imply that it was anything but physical appearance and if so, does not the person who chooses to date you have the right to pick who they find attractive in this way? True it still hurts to hear someone say anything about us is not attractive to them but I feel that if it had to do with anything but your skin color you might not have had as much of a problem with it. What if it was that you were too tall, too short, too thin, your breast size, hair color or any other non skin related thing? Would that not be entirely normal for them to have preferences? For this reason in the way that it was stated, they just simply are not attracted to you and if it is that they don't like black girls, so be it. I am half Japanese and don't particularly find most Asian women attractive, but that, is not a racial judgment, more of a physical appearance thing.

I think the problem lies in that the world seems to want to make everything about race and makes anything to do with race illegal to say or comment on. While I agree any judgment based on character quality or behavior related to racial things is wrong, I do believe the world has taken things so far that as soon as anything related to it is mentioned, even as it may be innocent, we automatically assume the person is being racist.

Being attracted to, or not attracted to a certain race for the physical attractiveness is natural and normal.

Dont' take it personally, they even stated they liked your personality. Thing is, it's all well and good to hope that someone will love us or just be attracted to us on personality alone but in reality that rarely happens.

[Katieissweet]

I always liked white and East Asian guys,now I like black guys as well.but I never meet black guys ever or mixed race guys for that matter.,im im australia.
And I think with east asian guys their mothers would have a fit if they brought a mixed race girl home.

Originally Posted by Wandering Soul

In my ethnicity you can find the very white skin with blue/green eyes and blonde hair, to the dark brown skin with dark eyes and hair. So, you can say, my ethnicity is mixed, in a way. I'm attracted to both ends, and to any combination between the two. I'm not white, though, because you seemed to care only about white guys' opinions. If there is a cultural and language barriers, I think getting along and relating will be harder. That's at least what I like to think about me living in North America. But it seems to me, even girls from my own ethnicity and who have culture and language ties with those of mine seem to prefer white guys (as you do), if they can attract them. So, I'm not sure if this is a universal thing.

[Katieissweet]

Yes it was the nurse and maybe you're right it has nothing to do with my race/looks but a multitude of other reasons,but because that other nurse didn't seem to care about the rules and flirted with me all day it strange that the other one just stopped interacting with me.i don't really like him much anymore but I do think race is a big factor even in online dating its a huge deal.

Originally Posted by divine1966

It doesn't appear as op was talking about herself being rejected but rather she read it somewhere. Also it doesn't seem she knows if that's why she was rejected. It is just a speculation. Recent rejection was a nurse in inpatient facility who has been avoiding her after being romantically pursued. He simply isn't allowed to be romantic with his patients regardless of their race. It isn't as much rejection as him doing his job

Now if there was another rejection I don't know but unless you know for sure you cant assume it's due to race

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[divine1966]

I don't believe it is very productive to hope for romance with nurses in inpatient facility. The ones that follow along are rotten human beings with no morals because it's just wrong to flirt with patients and the ones that would avoid you value their job and might be good people but they will never be with you.

There are other men out there. I would avoid flirting with nurses on the job.

As about race yes it does play a role in life but also depends where you live

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[hubieg]

Feel free to call me whatever you may wish, but, it is up to you and you alone to decide what type of person you find attractive to you. When it comes to relationships we are still free to "discriminate" based on race, creed, ethnicity, size of feet or whatever you wish, and not be made to feel guilty about it.

[Katieissweet]

I wasn't attempting to make anyone feel guilty,I understand very well people have preferences,gosh.
I was just talking about my experiences.

[Katieissweet]

Well I dreamt I had a past life with him i suppose that's why some soul ties are hard to cut regardless of situation/profession.

Originally Posted by divine1966

I don't believe it is very productive to hope for romance with nurses in inpatient facility. The ones that follow along are rotten human beings with no morals because it's just wrong to flirt with patients and the ones that would avoid you value their job and might be good people but they will never be with you.

There are other men out there. I would avoid flirting with nurses on the job.

As about race yes it does play a role in life but also depends where you live

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I was rejected as a Jew by a group of Israelis that I met while living in Japan; they told me that although I had a Jewish father and family name, I was not a "real" Jew under halachic law because my mother was not Jewish. I suggested that a more inclusive ideology would be appropriate for a few million Israelis surrounded by a billion hostile Muslims and they assured me that they didn't need my help. I retaliated via biowarfare by passing one of them an especially virulent strain of HPV from my mother's side.

I am darker and mediterranean. I like blond blue-eyed men. Sue me.