A letter

I'm posting this here instead of actually sending it to my ex-roommate because sending it to her wouldn't do any real good, just cause more strife, but I need to say these things aloud and get them out of my brain so I can move on. I'm not actually looking for responses, just need to get it out of my brain.

Dear Ex-Roommate,

You had an awful lot to say about what a terrible roommate I am. You claimed I never did chores, which is absolutely not true. I did chores quite often but when I was waiting for a week to go by to do them again, because you said we'd do chores weekly, you couldn't wait for a week to go by and would do them before I could get to them. I don't see how this is my fault when we agreed upon a weekly schedule. Furthermore, if you had a problem and felt I should do more, then why didn't you speak up? I can't read your mind. I'm not psychic. It's not fair to imagine that I know what you're thinking and what's upsetting you.

Regarding the door hinge. You knew when I moved in that the door was hanging on the hinge because you're the one that showed it to me. Why you didn't report it to the landlord during the time I lived there, I don't know, but why you act like I should have told you about it again, I don't know either, when you already knew about it. So stop trying to blame me for damages that existed before I moved in.

You think you were the perfect roommate, but your OCD behaviors made you impossible to live with. You were inconsiderate, when I was laying down with a migraine you decided that it was a good time to blast music and vacuum at the same time. You put my very expensive service dog outside and left him there when you left the house. People steal dogs left in yards all the time, and this was very upsetting to me that you would do this without my permission. YOu were also very cruel to him on many occasions, being mad that he sometimes broke the rules and got on the sofa, when your smelly cats got on the sofa all the time.

Speaking of the cats, for someone with so much OCD about cleanliness and who reamed me out for not doing chores as often as they would like, you let the litter box stink up the house all the time. Every day I would get home from work and that damn litter box smelled like crap all the time. It was disgusting. How you can live with that filth, I do not know.

You are a toxic person to be around. You are extremely judgmental and talk about your other friends and I don't even know why you are friends with them if you say so many bad things about them. I also have never seen you hang out with anyone who is gay or black or basically not white and straight and you act like an entitled whiny, privileged brat. This really bothers me about your personality and I didn't notice it about you until I had to live with you for a few months.

Furthermore, you need to stop *****ing about any cleaning you had to do since you took back the house key from me on the 15th even though I had paid rent through the whole month. My stuff was all out by the 20th so frankly I feel like you should refund me $150 worth of rent. Either refund that rent or shut your damn mouth.

You wanted a roommate just for the money and then you treated me like ****. Claiming, well I'm kinda an introvert, is no excuse for being a ***** to the person you are living with.

Let's talk about the mornings: how you thought it was funny that you had to set your alarms two hours before you had to get up and there were like 4 different alarms going off that woke me up so I was forced to get up extremely early in the morning because you can't be bothered to get up when your alarm goes off. THEN, I had to schedule my morning routine around yours so you wouldn't be put out. So if you needed to shower by 815, then I had to get up extra early and plan my whole morning around making sure you could use the shower at a certain time, instead of you ever having to get up early to get ready because you had to share the bathroom. WIth my depression getting up this early and having to walk on eggshells around you cause extreme fatigue for me, so I was exhausted at the end of the day. All because I was trying to be considerate of you. But you would never acknowledge or admit that. Because you were the perfect roommate....right.

So **** you and your high horse.

Seesaw

And my rant is over....Maybe I'll add to it later if I remember more that I need to get off my chest.

Good job turning here instead of sending that to them lol. It's healthy to get it off your chest. And I must say, every roommate situation I've seen go bad had something to do with chores. My bf lives with me and it's all we fight about!

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It sounds like you had quite a toxic room mate.

I think the move will help you get the breathing space that you need.

Hopefully writing this alleviated a bit of what you were feeling.

Agreeing with Crazy Hitch.

This room mate was really psycho!

It's definitely good to vent about it.

Yeah, I wasn't perfect but she didn't communicate. And that was worse.

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My daughter had awful roommates all through college and few years after, was once attacked by a roommate as literally got in her face over chores then roommate smoke pot then some wouldn't pay their portion of the bills. It's tough to live with people. Yours sound horrid! Glad you done with her

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It wasn't that she was horrid, really. It was that she expected me to read her mind and then got super passive aggressive about everything. Not trying to excuse her behavior, but I did make mistakes too. I should have made us a written out chore schedule and that would have solved many problems.

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