[shebby]

My boyfriend and I have been together for a year now, we've lived together the entire time(he got me away from an abusive relationship) and things have been an emotional roller coaster ride, to say the least. Weve run in to a number of problems in the past, and we recovered quite well, but there was only a short period of time before things got bad again.
Long story short; We both lost our jobs so we're currently unemployed and running very short on funds, we've had an issue with the law so now we have the stress of court hanging over us, and while all of this is going on everyone seems to have forgotten about us(that's how my boyfriend feels at least)
His whole life he's had the support from his parents and he's always had a solid group of friends to at least take his mind off of things, but suddenly his parents have stopped supporting him and even contacting him and his friends never call him anymore. I think he's really struggling with not getting depressed about all of this (he has ADHD too, idk how that would have an effect on what's going on though?) Hes told me already that he's angry at his family for just tossing him away, avoiding him, and not even calling to make sure things are ok. The last time they talked to him was close to a month ago now, and for all they know he could be in jail or something.
He's really struggled with the idea of being alone before, and just today I found a note he wrote (fairly recently) in a journal he keeps saying something along the lines of "There's something worse than alone, being forgotten, discarded, unwanted" I keep on trying to reassure him that no matter what happens, I'm sticking with him through this but I'm not sure he's convinced. He won't open up to me because he was taught as a kid that men shouldn't talk about feelings and shouldn't cry and things like that, so I don't know how to approach any of this without making him feel uncomfortable. I constantly try to avoid situations like this when I'm in his position, so my communication skills are terrible. I want know what's going on with him/what he's feeling or thinking, but it's hard when I can't even open up to people about anything either. I love him with everything in me and I desperately want to help him as much as he's helped me. I hate that he feels so alone and forgotten but I understand it.

Is there any advice anyone can give me as to how to approach this, or tips on how to talk to people for myself so that I can at least improve?

[Skeezyks]

Hello shabby: I'm sorry you & your bf are having such a difficult time. From my perspective, the only way your bf is going to be helped is if he makes the decision to get the help he needs. Unless or until he does this, I'm afraid there's not much you can do except to be there for him when he needs you... to the extent you are able. And, in the meantime, if you're not already doing so, seek some therapy for yourself to help you to stay emotionally strong & healthy.

If there is a family member of your bf's you could talk to, perhaps you could find out why it is they have abandoned him & see if there is anything you can do in this regard to smooth things over. But be forewarned. There would be dangers inherent in such an action. You may only manage to make everyone, including your bf, mad at you for "sticking your nose in", so to speak.

[divine1966]

I am confused on how do you know what's in his private journal? What type of law problems we are discussing here? Is too many speeding tickets or selling drugs? ( just an example) Their lack of involvement might have something to do with yours and his law problems?

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