Cant count on him

So here i am again today is Friday and my baby father was suppose to watch his child today for me to go to work. his agreed days are Tuesdays and Fridays because Monday Wednesday and Thursdays my mom is with her. so long story short he has not been coming to watch her for the pass two weeks, and his excuse is because he is stressed out or he got arrested or his car didn't start or he woke up late and couldn't make it. Now i thank god for my mom because she is doing way more than what he is at this point. I am new to my current job now and cant afford to call out because it doesn't look good so my mom sacrifices her days to cover when he doesn't show up. I don't know what to do anymore because i cant keep having my mom do it all and especially a day like today she is watching her again she took my daughter with her to her job as she is a home health aide and cares for an elderly woman at her home. I'm so stressed out already I'm going to explode.

He got arrested? What happened?

Can you look into daycare options? Licensed in home daycares may be less expensive than the more commercial daycare centers. My friend had her daughter in a licensed home daycare for years and it was a good experience for them. Also, churches often have daycares with reasonable prices.

Thinking of you.

i can look into daycare options but it seems like he wants me to pay for that alone too. i cant afford to pay for daycare im barely making ends meet now without any help.

If you file for child support and request for day care help he'll have to pay. File for support immediately

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Ok going on from what I'd said before in the thread about child support. You need to get legal support. The case for you getting custody of the child from him is building. With him not supporting you as the childs mother, not financially and clearly not being in the child's life either, the thing is he is really choosing to lose custody of his child. The court will not look positively on his actions in either of those areas but you need to take the reins here and do something about it. Wasting time here on the forums to vent is fine for advice but so far I don't see you doing anything.

Please take it upon yourself to do something, call a lawyer. Don't wait. You're imposing on your mother now, not your fault I know but still imposing. Because of your inaction and his lack of father-characteristics, other people are suffering too. Your child and now your mother too, obviously it's a given that you are also but my point being this is not isolated to just you or even just you and child now.

So NOW it is time to face the fact that you made a bad choice of your child's father. The cozy, wonderful family that you envision will not happen with this guy. Be done with it for both you and your child's sake! Call now to get help. Legal Aid, if available in your state, is no cost to you. Please, please do something today.

I know what i need to do moving forward i am on here to vent and yes for some advice but who are you to say you dont see me doing anything when you dont even know me or what i am doing to say that. Yes i will make the necessary steps to change things i been thinking on it for a while but just was giving him the benefit of doubt because i thought he would change. thank you.

((((gentle hugs))))

Of course it's frustrating. No your mom can't be expected to pick up his slack and no you can't jeopardize your own employment.

What about something like getting onto a child care circuit? A day care voucher? It can take months, but putting your name on the list is a step towards relieving you of stress and burden.

Sorry that he's turned out to be such a disappointment. You don't deserve the stress.

Please file for child support. Money from child support can help pay for daycare and you won't have to beg him.