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Old Oct 11, 2016, 01:16 AM
Shortie87X Shortie87X is offline
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Member Since: Feb 2013
Posts: 22
From 2013 to 2015, I had an on-off relationship. He was a victim of child abuse and had PTSD which led to various trust and commitment issues. Up until this summer, we still kept in contact and remained in a limbo of not single but not together. He is a wonderful person but a horrible boyfriend, so I let him go back in July. Since then, I've received multiple texts from him, but not anything substantial. Most recently, he messaged me a week ago saying he was feeling sentimental and wanted to thank me for being the one person who stood by him etc etc. it's all stuff I've heard from him before and I used to take him back afterward. Now I know that unless I stay gone, there's no chance he'll change.

Can someone please advise me on how to make him stop communicating with me? I've already bluntly clarified my lack of interest back in August and I haven't answered his texts since but I still receive them. Otherwise even someone providing the motivation for me to keep up what I'm doing would help. I feel extremely guilty even if the ending to our relationship and our current problems were a result of his actions. I want nothing more than to go back and help him as I always have but I know it won't be good for me. Luckily I have since moved away so it's just slightly easier since I won't see him around.
Hugs from:
unaluna

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  #2  
Old Oct 11, 2016, 01:39 AM
Psychosiad Psychosiad is offline
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Member Since: Oct 2016
Location: UK
Posts: 43
Is he very reliant on you emotionally? I got that feeling, not sure why. Someone once said that I was too dependent on them and I needed to be by myself for a while to lea n how to cope as an individual before I could be in an equal relationship and it helped me to take a step back. It wasn't a break up but we did stop communicating and I didn't feel hurt I felt like he was right and it was the right thing to do for myself and for him.
Make it seem like it's the best thing for both of you? (As that's probably true)
  #3  
Old Oct 11, 2016, 01:48 AM
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Crazy Hitch Crazy Hitch is online now
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Member Since: Nov 2013
Location: Australia
Posts: 27,572
Hey Shortie I think out of everything you wrote, this is the most pivotal statement:

"I want nothing more than to go back and help him as I always have but I know it won't be good for me."

Bottom line is, you gotta look after yourself right now - if it's not good for you, you probably need a much needed break.

If I were you I'd send him a polite text and tell him you need to sort out some things in your own life; and in the time being; unfortunately you need to block him on your mobile. I'd possibly say it won't be a "forever" block; and when the time is right for you; you will make contact with him, at some stage ...
  #4  
Old Oct 11, 2016, 06:28 AM
Bill3 Bill3 is offline
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Member Since: Mar 2009
Location: USA
Posts: 10,966
You cannot make him stop texting you.

You can block him.

I would not though give him (and yourself) hope that someday you may come back. You have learned through painful experience that this relationship is not going to work.

An option is to not tell him that you are blocking him. If you tell him, you will be tempted to want to know how he is handling this news, and he will be tempted to contact you by mail etc. to give you his reaction to this news.
  #5  
Old Oct 11, 2016, 06:43 AM
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divine1966 divine1966 is offline
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Member Since: Dec 2014
Location: US
Posts: 23,224
You can't make people do things. You can make yourself stop texting/calling etc
Thanks for this!
Trippin2.0
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