[jean17]

It gets worse as the weather changes and I can't exhaust myself in the garden. I am so alone and so lonely. It's my own fault. I just have no idea how to make a friend. I'm so terrified of people that superficiality is all I am capable of. So I am caught in a trap. Lonely - scared - lonely-scared. I wish I knew how to fix it. I'm not even friends with my sisters.

[gayleggg]

I'm sorry you are suffering. Making friends is not easy, especially for those of us that have anxiety. You might try joining a gardening group since you like to garden. I just joined one and felt a bit awkward but had a pretty good time over all. All of the ladies were nice. It only meets once a month but I figured I could pull out of my comfort zone for that. Good luck.

[Yours_Truly]

I can relate. I'm friendless too. Many of us here are in the same boat so can make some friends here.

[Delicious]

It's strange how changing weather can trigger emotions or make them worse. We're all here for you to try and help, you've always got friends here

[Frownosaurus Rex]

"I am so alone and so lonely. It's my own fault."

You are not alone, we are here for you as friends, and as a community, Jean17 I'm currently estranged, to the point of no contact, with an older sister and an identical twin brother. I've pointedly decided to create my own family and friend circle here, now. Hang in there, keep posting, you're not alone

[ptangptang]

It's a lonely old world now with the break up of families, no community, dog eat dog greed lack of compassion, internet anonymity,drop off in church going ( I'm not religious but at least they provided community and support) and various other societal issues. You are not alone in feeling like this.
Although my experiences of volunteering have been mixed I guess it can be good. is there a gardening project you can get involved with. become a guerilla gardener. brighten up the neighbourhood. Modern society sucks in a lot of ways but it is what it is and what we have made it. Good luck

[DwNouT]

Sometimes you can be friends with the wrong people and would not want you around but only to get what they want from you >
Would hurt you and cause confusion. Im starting to faith in being friends with anyone Im starting to feel more hate towards myself.

[DwNouT]

Why is it so hard to find and keep friends?

Hi jean, I'm from Canada too and i do know how much weather can worsen things. I used to have a garden and even then our season shortens the time we can spend in it. Good suggestions already up there.. do you have any space indoors for some plants and maybe flowers to brighten things? wish there was a simple way to make friends but i don't know how either so i spend more time on here to lessen the feelings of loneliness. I don't think you should blame yourself, it's really difficult to find friends.

[CrimsonKing]

I understand how you feel about being lonely. I sometimes feel so helpless. I feel like I'm trapped and deserted. My wife left me about a month and a half ago. I know that I'm going through some separation issues but my fear is that I will always be alone and have to learn to cope with it. My days are very empty and I wonder sometimes why I even bother to get out of bed. I sometimes have problems with connecting to others and I can be very, very shy too. I really hate the loneliness the most it's devastating.

I only have one true friend in that he never judges me and always tries to support me. He's also my ex. How sad is that? We were always more friends really.

I get lonely sometimes but have thought of getting a dog as they give unconditional love.

[RamblinClementine]

I have a hard time with friendships, too. I'm sorry you are feeling lonely. I like the idea of trying to join a group! I have anxiety too so that doesn't sound easy for me either, but... it's always good to get yourself out there if you are feeling lonely.

[Scorpio84]

Originally Posted by DwNouT

Why is it so hard to find and keep friends?

In my case it is since i had to work in Africa for 1 year (makes 7 months now) i regret it
im living with a couple but still felt lonely most time even though i have a hobbie (ps vita)

In here you can't just walk the streets too far like in Europe
so i have to live with this insecurities with very limited chances to go find friends
my life is work then straight home everyday, if i had no hobbie i would go insane here.

Its like my life became a jail with nowhere to go, most monotonous life i experienced in life.