[rdgrad15]

For some reason, I am always considered an outcast when it comes to social situations of any kind, and even work related when it comes to working. In terms of regular social situations outside of work, like previous school experiences and even now, it happens a lot.

Like in one example, I made a joke that I thought would be funny and I was told by someone to never say that again and that it was not funny. But the not one minute later, someone else made the exact same joke and everyone laughed.

It is as if I am not allowed to joke around but other people are. Same for doing stuff. In a situation at work, a coworker got mad at me for asking her a couple of questions and told me to leave and that I was distracting. But then other coworkers went to talk to her and she acted like she was fine with it.

So even at work, I feel like I am treated differently and not allowed to do certain things while others can. Makes me feel like that means they secretly do not like me when people in general do this stuff. Makes me feel like they can be themselves but not me.

In the case at work, the same coworker also was mad at another coworker for talking to her at a specific time and talked about her behind her back stating how she thought someone else was annoying. Yet she is perfectly okay with others to talk to her. Made me very uncomfortable.

When stuff like this happens at work or a social gathering, it makes me feel like I am not wanted. Does anyone know why this stuff happens? Has anyone ever experienced this either at work or any other social event or even at school? How did you handle it? Did you put your foot down or let it go?

I would never do this at work since it would be unprofessional, but at any other social situation outside of work, there has been times when I just got up and left. May sound immature but I really don't like being singled out if I do something and get negative responses, but it is okay for others to do the same thing.

I would first let it slide but if it continued, which it usually did, then I would quietly, without making a scene, just walk away. In a way, yes that is immature, but I feel like I shouldn't have to deal with that. I feel like if people really liked me as a friend, they wouldn't act like I am not allowed to say or do things but others are. Still trying to figure out how to deal with it at work. For now, I just stay clear unless the coworker initiates conversation, since it is possible she doesn't like me either. But it is way more rare for it to happen at work, which is good.

Originally Posted by rdgrad15

For some reason, I am always considered an outcast when it comes to social situations of any kind, and even work related when it comes to working. In terms of regular social situations outside of work, like previous school experiences and even now, it happens a lot.

Like in one example, I made a joke that I thought would be funny and I was told by someone to never say that again and that it was not funny. But the not one minute later, someone else made the exact same joke and everyone laughed.

It is as if I am not allowed to joke around but other people are. Same for doing stuff. In a situation at work, a coworker got mad at me for asking her a couple of questions and told me to leave and that I was distracting. But then other coworkers went to talk to her and she acted like she was fine with it.

So even at work, I feel like I am treated differently and not allowed to do certain things while others can. Makes me feel like that means they secretly do not like me when people in general do this stuff. Makes me feel like they can be themselves but not me.

In the case at work, the same coworker also was mad at another coworker for talking to her at a specific time and talked about her behind her back stating how she thought someone else was annoying. Yet she is perfectly okay with others to talk to her. Made me very uncomfortable.

When stuff like this happens at work or a social gathering, it makes me feel like I am not wanted. Does anyone know why this stuff happens? Has anyone ever experienced this either at work or any other social event or even at school? How did you handle it? Did you put your foot down or let it go?

I would never do this at work since it would be unprofessional, but at any other social situation outside of work, there has been times when I just got up and left. May sound immature but I really don't like being singled out if I do something and get negative responses, but it is okay for others to do the same thing.

I would first let it slide but if it continued, which it usually did, then I would quietly, without making a scene, just walk away. In a way, yes that is immature, but I feel like I shouldn't have to deal with that. I feel like if people really liked me as a friend, they wouldn't act like I am not allowed to say or do things but others are. Still trying to figure out how to deal with it at work. For now, I just stay clear unless the coworker initiates conversation, since it is possible she doesn't like me either. But it is way more rare for it to happen at work, which is good.

Yes it has happened to me and still does. Yes, I put my foot down....I put it down whenever it's called for (this includes work). There are ways to put your foot down which are professional and perhaps learning some assertiveness could do you wonders. People will treat you how you allow them to treat you. Sometimes the person is just pathetic so I do let it go because arguing with an idiot gets you nowhere.....but when it matters and counts you need to be firm but rational and state your case. You might be surprised because people often respect people who respect themselves. And if they don't, please refer back to my statement about arguing with idiots.