[Shirt1212]

Since I was very young it was made clear to me that I was weird and there for didn't fit in with people. No clue why this was my lot but ok. Then when I hit the age were you are supposed to date I didn't really start dating I took school very seriously and thought that's what I should do. When I did find a boy friend my mom started to make it out like I was just like her. When that relationship ended my mom still held on hope that we would find each other again or something.

Fast forward a few years I dated around nothing serious until I met my husband, he worked with me he was from the other side of the city and we just hit it off. We've been together 9 years now coming up on our 7th wedding anniversary. As soon as I was married my mom started obsessing about me having kids. My husband deployed the first year we were married, and I wanted to wait a while. All while my mom was pressuring me to have kids. I was saying how it would be cool to be pregnant with my last when my sister was pregnant with her first. My mom pops off "or both your first no one waits as long as you!" Ps my sister is 3 years younger than me and at the time didn't even have a boyfriend. I was also 24, not 40 hell even if I was 40 it's my life. Well cut to I have my first kid a few years later and soon fall pregnant with my second. My mom starts her crap again but this time she hates my husband, never aproved of him. Starts talking about my ex all the time. My ex from when I was 17! I'm 27 and pregnant with my second child not to mention married, happily! And this wasn't just oh hey I bumped into so and so or his mom, no this was "I miss him, he would sit in our kitchen and laugh at your step dads good old day stories, I could have a beer with him!" Again he was 17 at the time wtf of course you could you were giving beer to a 17 year old! So I ask her to stop bringing him up, it's rude it ended and frankly it wasn't a good relationship. He was always trying to change me, he cheated on me and all his friends hated me. I'm better off crazy lady.

Here is my thing like what is her thinking. I needed to get pregnant by any means because of my age I guess then I need to get back with my ex who frankly is to shallow to take me back even if I wanted him. Or alternatively get another guy to take care of me. Which is her life. I don't know I just don't get it. I know now that she really does hate my husband and I know most of her reasons she made up, and the long and short is she can't control him.

I just don't get her thinking. I desperately needed to be furtilized because of my age or something. Who knows

Thanks for reading my ramblings just trying to get things out. ♥️

[TishaBuv]

I'm still trying to figure out my mother, too.