Double standards

I am currently going through a rough patch with my husband. Since he retired in February there has been a rapid increase in his use of double standards. He will defend everyone except me even of they have just done the same action that I have been berated for. When I try to discuss an issue with him, he is more than happy to give his opinion but immediately becomes angry and defensive when it is my turn to give my opinion. He is intolerant of any perspectives except his. We had a huge fight over this but i never got to give my side of the story.

I don't know if there is much I can offer with regard to this. The one thing I can share is that my wife & I are both retired now. And on top of that we have no extended family & no friends of any real consequence. So as a result we spend a lot of time together... maybe too much!

Interpersonal dynamics within a marriage certainly do change following retirement. Plus I think it can be particularly hard on men's egos. Our next door neighbors are also retired. But both of them do a lot of separate volunteer work. So they don't spend near as much time together as my wife & I do. They may be better off for it. I don't know If you & your husband continue to have difficulty, one solution may be to simply figure out ways to spend less time with one another. (Perhaps your hubby needs to find some volunteer work to do, a retirement job, or a hobby in which he can become engrossed.) Beyond that, of course, couples counseling may be helpful if your hubby is amenable.

I see this is your first post here on PC. So... to PsychCentral… from the Skeezyks! May the time you spend here be of benefit.

PsychCentral is a great place to get information as well as support for mental health issues. The more you post, & reply to other members’ posts, the more a part of the community you will become. Plus there are social groups you can join & chat rooms where you’ll be able to connect with other PC members in real time (once your first 5 posts have been reviewed & approved.) Lots of great stuff! So please keep posting!

Some people only see in black and white and think it's their way or the highway.

I'm taking it you've put up with this for quite some time.

Not sure what to suggest but just wanted to say hang in there