[jennifer02]

My boyfriend which is in his mid 30s and I which have been together for almost 3 years, has been communicating with a girl(27) that he calls a friend that he knows from some time ago and supposedly knows her family as well, as far as I know, he's been talking on and off to her the whole time of him and I being together, she lives in a different state than him and I do,so she is far away.but she does live very close to the state that my bf is originally from.

When him and I started dating I remember he talked about this girl a few times and he couldn't understand certain things surrounding her and her marital issues/Problems and he tried helping her and still does, I did not care at that time very much to be honest,in the back of my head I was like yeah ok whatever, but several months, I do recall it creating certain doubts in me, and questioning myself of who is this guy really and what's his past!

So recently we were together and he was telling me that she had contacted him, because she is going trough some ''rough'' issues and he needed to help her because it was serious.he told me she comes and goes looking for his advice or when she has problems,He seems very connected to her and My thoughts are: 1-This girl is either using him as an emotional dishrag and he likes it for some reason 2-the most obvious she is an ex lover and there is an ulterior motive behind all of this chit chat, or 3- there is something more to this that he is not telling me.

[Zedsdead]

On the surface from what you have wrote, it sounds pretty innocent. I also think it's normal for you to be curious of what the intent of their contact really is.
I would continue to trust that it is nothing, let him be open to you about their relationship.
If he starts to hides things or you sense things are going too far, red flags start arising, shut it down.
If anything does happen behind your back, if he cheats with this woman, then you know hes not worth your time. It can only go as far as he let's it.

Can I vote for both played and lied to?

[Erebos]

Originally Posted by Lefty the Salesman

Can I vote for both played and lied to?

There were 3 options. Lol.

It sounds fairly innocuous, and since she has been a friend since before you were dating, I would be careful before making any assumptions.,
He hasn't given you any reason to disbelieve him.
What makes you so certain there is something to it?

Maybe wait and see, if he continues being open and honest about their contact, you could offer your own take on her problems.(to him of course.)
If he becomes secretive, which will also happen if he feels wrongly accused, maybe just ask how she is doing etc.

Ultimately if he is going to cheat nothing you can d will stop him, and being wary of any woman who crosses his path, perhaps says more about you and him, than him and them.

Good luck, and if things are bothering you, voice your worries, calmly and rationally. Give him the opportunity to reassure you.
Try and remember,her motives aren't important. His are.