[lovethesun]

About 10 years ago, I had just moved in to a new house and my brother-in-law and his daughters came to visit as they wanted to see the house. I went out of my way to welcome my brother-in-law and was happy he had come to visit. He asked if he could look around the house and I let him. As he walked around the house, he proceeded to say the paint colors were ugly, the front porch had a defect that could cause someone to fall and sue us, the fact that the houses were too close together and that would "make him claustrophobic", the backyard was small, the bedrooms were small...etc. You get the picture. He had nothing nice to say about the house. When he wasn't complaining about the house, he was just silent. But never uttered anything kind about the house. I was so disappointed. And for the record, our house was in good condition and almost brand new. And my BIL is not a home inspector. So no reason for his negative comments. He made me feel bad about the house because he was so jealous. I've never forgotten it. Well, here we are in 2017 and my brother-in-law has just bought a new house of his own. And guess what? He has been repeatedly asking for us to come visit to see it. I'd like to do the same thing to him he did to me. Should I? At the very least, I will not compliment him on it.

[Keeki04]

Nah, I say let this rest where it lays. While it might feel good to come at your brother-in-law, it obviously didn't make you feel good when he did it to you. Letting someone else control your emotions never worked, because he will love his house the same way you love yours. He can't see the value in your house and that was his loss, but your house is amazing and you saw that.

[A Red Panda]

Honestly, that's really petty. It seems to be a trend in your threads - you really seem to enjoy holding grudges and being bitter.

It was 10 years ago. Getting 'revenge' ten years later for something so petty is ridiculous. Yes, your BIL was a massive jerk - no question. But you're contemplating being just as much of a jerk as he was.

[divine1966]

Honestly you seem to always have conflicts with people, either arguments or some perceived injustices or grudges etc You either choosing wrong people (of course you can't choose BIL) or you just look for conflicts. It happened 10 years ago. He perhaps is a jerk. Who knows. You didn't address it then. So now 10 years passed Time to move on and stop worrying about it

Rise above that kind of behavior. Be the better person.

[lovethesun]

Originally Posted by A Red Panda

Honestly, that's really petty. It seems to be a trend in your threads - you really seem to enjoy holding grudges and being bitter.

It was 10 years ago. Getting 'revenge' ten years later for something so petty is ridiculous. Yes, your BIL was a massive jerk - no question. But you're contemplating being just as much of a jerk as he was.

Well, thanks for your input. And if it seems like all my threads paint me as a bitter grudge holding person, please know that's not the kind of person I am. It's just that the matters I seek advice on within this forum have to do with people who have not treated me well. It doesn't mean all people treat me badly, nor does it mean I treat all people badly. Truth is, I've probably let far too many people get away with bad behavior towards me.

[lovethesun]

Originally Posted by divine1966

Honestly you seem to always have conflicts with people, either arguments or some perceived injustices or grudges etc You either choosing wrong people (of course you can't choose BIL) or you just look for conflicts. It happened 10 years ago. He perhaps is a jerk. Who knows. You didn't address it then. So now 10 years passed Time to move on and stop worrying about it

***See my reply to A Red Panda. And thanks for your thoughts.**

[lovethesun]

Originally Posted by divine1966

Honestly you seem to always have conflicts with people, either arguments or some perceived injustices or grudges etc You either choosing wrong people (of course you can't choose BIL) or you just look for conflicts. It happened 10 years ago. He perhaps is a jerk. Who knows. You didn't address it then. So now 10 years passed Time to move on and stop worrying about it

One other thing Divine, you said in your reply that I did not address it when it happened. You're right. Now that I'm older and a little wiser, that will not happen anymore. Far more painful to regret what wasn't said, than to say something that I regret. At least for me anyway. So woe be to the next person who disrespects me to my face.

[Erebos]

Chances are he probably doesn't even remember what he said about your house. So it might appear your attacking him for no reason.
That will only cause more trouble.
Really though, 10 years!
Wow!
Let it go and move on with dignity.

[MickeyCheeky]

I don't think you should do that.. it's been 10 years, he probably even forgot about it.

It depends on what you wish to get out of this encounter. I agree with your assumption that he was probably very jealous but perhaps it's something different that went down. What will make you feel best about this situation at the end of the day?