[Hedgeleaf]

My abusive ex has reared his head....Again

I hadn't spoken to him for 4 months.

He emails (he's blocked from txts and calls) saying he loves me and wants another chance and knows we can make each other happy. I reply saying i don't love him and he needs to stop contacting me. A few weeks pass and he emails again so i ask him why he's doing this and he said he just wants another chance. I replied telling him I'm seeing someone​ and now and please move on with your life.

He totally flipped.

He always thought i was cheating but i never did.

He has been sending me email after email full of total hatred.

Here are a few quotes;
You honestly repulse me. The 1st thing I'm doing Tuesday is getting myself an STI check, **** knows where you've been

You've got until Friday for my stuff to get back to me. If it's not, your scummy, infected sex toys that are still at mine will be dropped outside your front door

You even had the cheek to say i was being possessive, when really that was just an excuse so u could.do your normal thing of juggling 2 cocks.

You've got til Friday for my stuff to come back

He wants the gifts he gave me back. When we broke up he told me to throw them away which i did. My main worry is that he's said if i don't give them back he will come to my door.

I told him if he contacts me again I'm calling the police. He replied saying if i do that he will contact my ex husband and tell him what a slut o am.

I've called the police and going to the station tmw to give a statement.

I've been seeing a new guy for a few weeks, should i tell him what's going on??

I'm terrified of him please help

[TishaBuv]

You are doing the right thing making a police report. Have the police tell him you threw out his gifts so you can't give them back.

He can call the queen to tell her you're a slut, don't worry about that.

I think I'd lay low with the new guy for a few more weeks, stay out of sight from where your ex may be able to spy on you, don't bring new guy home for now, make sure you are not being followed.

I wouldn't tell new guy for fear of scaring him off, but don'[t put him in jeopardy. Unless this gets worse. I hope it doesn't.

[Hedgeleaf]

Originally Posted by TishaBuv

You are doing the right thing making a police report. Have the police tell him you threw out his gifts so you can't give them back.

He can call the queen to tell her you're a slut, don't worry about that.

I think I'd lay low with the new guy for a few more weeks, stay out of sight from where your ex may be able to spy on you, don't bring new guy home for now, make sure you are not being followed.

I wouldn't tell new guy for fear of scaring him off, but don'[t put him in jeopardy. Unless this gets worse. I hope it doesn't.

Thanks so much for the reply. What do you think the police will do?
He's also go very intimate pictures and videos I'm worried he'll share.

No way do i want to scare new guy away but as this is happening right now I wondered if i should mention it?

[TishaBuv]

The police will make a report and call him or go to his house and tell him they know about his threats and he better leave you alone.

I've had this experience myself with an ex (the same ex twice!! My mistake)

My ex actually told me I was right to call the cops or he never would have stopped.

[Hedgeleaf]

This is my main fear.

He hates the police. I'm so so scared them calling on him will make him react even.more

I'm so sorry about what you went through

[TishaBuv]

Has he ever been physically violent with you? With others?

[Hedgeleaf]

No never with me. Always verbal and emotional.

He's very verbally agressive. Been in fights in his younger days

[TheDragon]

This is such a crappy situation for you to be in and I'm sorry you had to put up with someone so toxic in your life. You're taking all the right steps by contacting the police. It must be a scary time for you, but know that we here at PC are behind you. Stay strong!

[TishaBuv]

Then I think chances are very good he wont get violent. My ex said the cops coming to his door scared the shyt out of him and he left me alone. This guy deserves that. It'll teach him you won't take his harassment. A guy knowing the police know all about him cools off and goes away. And, no matter what, don't you contact him again.

[TishaBuv]

Don't fret about a bag of dildos being left at your door. Just laugh that one off. Bzzzzzz

[TishaBuv]

I hate that people can turn into such horrible jerks in a break up.

The situation with my ex, was just that he flipped out when I left him. I didn't know how emotionally disturbed he was. He said he has 'abandonment issues'.

But your guy is being mean, threatening to embarrass you, calling you names, paranoid fears of you cheating...

[Hedgeleaf]

I was in such a good place mentally until now. I was so happy with me and with life. Now i feel sick like i used to before and my anxiety has sky rocketed

[TishaBuv]

You'll get through this. It's pretty common for an ex to try to get you back and then get really abusive when you say no. I hope this stops now and you can feel free again soon.

[Bill3]

(((((Hedgeleaf)))))

Hang in there! (And call the Police)

[Crazy Hitch]

Your ex is controlling and manipulative.

He's speaking the biggest load of bull.

He's intentionally trying to get a reaction and hurt you. Consider your blessings this relationship no longer exists! Phew!

Speak to your current partner about whats going on. I'm sure he can provide you with support

[Trippin2.0]

Please stop replying to his emails.

Why would you even do that in the first place, knowing how unstable your ex is!?

No point in blocking his texts and calls if you're still going to email him, you sent him mixed signals, no wonder he flipped out about new guy.

Make sure the police see copies of the email threats, that way they know exactly what they're dealing with, and for Christ sake, stop stoking the fire by returning his emails!

[Hedgeleaf]

Originally Posted by Trippin2.0

Please stop replying to his emails.

Why would you even do that in the first place, knowing how unstable your ex is!?

No point in blocking his texts and calls if you're still going to email him, you sent him mixed signals, no wonder he flipped out about new guy.

Make sure the police see copies of the email threats, that way they know exactly what they're dealing with, and for Christ sake, stop stoking the fire by returning his emails!

Sorry I'm not perfect. I replied as i was hoping that telling him I'm seeing someone would make him go away. Clearly i was in the wrong to do that but thanks for reinforcing i made a poor decision. It's really helped.

[Hedgeleaf]

Originally Posted by Crazy Hitch

Your ex is controlling and manipulative.

He's speaking the biggest load of bull.

He's intentionally trying to get a reaction and hurt you. Consider your blessings this relationship no longer exists! Phew!

Speak to your current partner about whats going on. I'm sure he can provide you with support

I'm just not sure what to say as i don't want to scare him off

[Bill3]

If you tell your boyfriend, how will he react?

[Hedgeleaf]

I'm not sure. I'm hoping he'll be kind and supportive. It's a new relationship so i don't want to do anything that could make him want to run a mile.
My ex returning in my life is a massive thing for me. It's.making me totally doubt myself all over again.
I just don't know who to turn to

[Bill3]

You did well to post here.

How do your ex's actions create self-doubt in you?7

[divine1966]

Immediately block him from everywhere.

Print all emails and give them to police. If you ever see him around, call police every time. Make sure you have police order for him not to be around you or contact you.

I am not sure you need to inform someone you just started dating two weeks. He might wonder why you are still talking to this guy and why you told him you are seeing someone else etc Just rely on police.

Be safe.

[Hedgeleaf]

Originally Posted by Bill3

You did well to post here.

How do your ex's actions create self-doubt in you?7

Thank you

I thought id come a long way since him but his appearance makes me wonder if i really have

[Hedgeleaf]

Originally Posted by divine1966

Immediately block him from everywhere.

Print all emails and give them to police. If you ever see him around, call police every time. Make sure you have police order for him not to be around you or contact you.

I am not sure you need to inform someone you just started dating two weeks. He might wonder why you are still talking to this guy and why you told him you are seeing someone else etc Just rely on police.

Be safe.

Thanks

I went to the station this morning and they said that with what I've presented them they are quite sure they will be able to arrest him. They will also issue him with a harassment order so he cannot contact me again

[TishaBuv]

In England, what he did is arrestable? In my state, that behavior just gets a warning. Even getting physically hurt just gets a restraining order. (That was my experience)