[Woodbridge105]

I was diagnosed about 5 years ago with BPD though I suspect I have had it for longer. I have done therapy, DBT, psychiatrist, medicine, etc. I go through cycles of okay periods and then periods of lashing out, irritability, distress etc. My husband is at the end of his rope. He thinks that is all me, that its all in my head, that I havent worked hard enough through therapy and medications. He doesnt like to hear criticism of his actions, triggers that lead to my outbursts. Im losing my husband, my family and I dont know what to do...what else can I try, how can i manage my emotions, how can I explain to people what I am going through. I need help as I feel I am sinking into a bad depression and not wanting to go on anymore...please help...

[COguy]

Looks like you've tried a bunch of things, that's good. What have you 'lashed out' over?

I'm no expert on BP, but can you just try not caring as much about the things you argue over? So many things hardly matter in the big scheme of life. How about talking it over in a counseling session tailored to the marriage?

I hope it works out for you.

[mctone]

Originally Posted by Woodbridge105

I was diagnosed about 5 years ago with BPD though I suspect I have had it for longer. I have done therapy, DBT, psychiatrist, medicine, etc. I go through cycles of okay periods and then periods of lashing out, irritability, distress etc. My husband is at the end of his rope. He thinks that is all me, that its all in my head, that I havent worked hard enough through therapy and medications. He doesnt like to hear criticism of his actions, triggers that lead to my outbursts. Im losing my husband, my family and I dont know what to do...what else can I try, how can i manage my emotions, how can I explain to people what I am going through. I need help as I feel I am sinking into a bad depression and not wanting to go on anymore...please help...

Marriage is a very tender subject for me. My wife left me after 11 years, and it felt like my world just crumbled at my feet, I'm still dealing with that. I don't know if I'm bipolar or not - never been diagnosed - but I do know that I was prone to lashing out at times. It's the ones we love the most that we tend to hurt the most.

I would urge you to seek a good, qualified marriage counselor who can not only help you with the things you're dealing with on a personal level, but also help your husband understand what you deal with. I have found that people who don't have any mental issues usually don't understand us who do. So they react in the only way they know how - disbelief that there is actually anything wrong with us. They often feel that these kinds of things are "made-up" or just "in our minds". They often don't understand that these things are very real, but also very treatable. Seek the help you need dear, and work to save your marriage - it's worth saving. PM me if you would like someone who's been there just to talk with... I'll be glad to talk with you any time. I hope this is helpful.

[Bill3]

I wonder if your husband would speak with some of the people who treat you or who have treated you in the past.