[kismetie]

I've known my closest friend for almost my entire life. We met when we were 7 and now we're 24. I'm not sure when exactly it happened, but things changed or there was this shift after high school.

I haven't thought of her as my best friend in some years now.

We've both got our own baggage and demons to battle and in the past there have been times where we haven't seen eye to eye, but it always blows over.

I know there's at least for sure 3 times where our friendship has been strained and instead of dealing with the problem, it has just been sweep under the rug.

I've tried to confront our issues in the past but they never seem to end well and I eventually cave in and apologize or fall back into regular routine without bringing up the past anymore.

My friend is in a crappy situation herself, one that isn't so easy for her to get out of right now or the near future (involves family ties) and unfortunately it has affected her negatively and made her toxic in certain ways.

**
Something happened a few weeks back, that I haven't been able to let go of.

The short and to the point version: Me and said friend ate an edible and it was too strong for me and I had a bad trip. She took care of me and apologized and I let her know it wasn't her fault, since I willingly took it with her and we didn't know how it would hit me.

Me taking the edible and having a bad trip wasn't the problem. The problem arose when a few days later, I asked her when would she have time to tell me what happened while I was under the influence of the edible and she told me that if I overreacted or started being annoying that she wouldn't even bother to tell me.

And that like hit me like I had been slapped in the face.

I told her I didn't think it was fair for her to withhold that kind of information from me and she just responded with "fair?" (we were texting).

I asked her if she was really not going to tell me and if she wasn't that was pretty messed up. She then ignored my text for about an hour and said she'd talk to me tomorrow. Completely dismissing me.

So I pressed on and followed up her text saying I hope that means tomorrow you are going to tell me what happened and then she total exploded on me (basically wrote in all caps like she does when she's fed up) and said, yes that's what that means, now I'll talk to you tomorrow good night. And then followed that text with you know what nevermind, I can just tell you over the phone or something you don't have to come over (because I had said I'd like to discuss it in person earlier).

I was so upset, I didn't contact her for a few days to give us both time to calm down. Then I eventually lost my nerve and let her tell me over text. Then eventually we fell back into our old routine.

I've since distanced myself from her (but we are extremely close. Seeing each other every week, sometimes several times a week and always on the phone and what not). I've only seen her maybe 3 times, 2 alone and yesterday with other friends. And haven't been texting or talking to her over the phone.

I can't seem to let this thing go or pass like I usually would. It doesn't feel right. Why would she think it's okay to react or treat me that way??

[TishaBuv]

She said 'if you overreacted or started being annoying'... I think she is bothered by you sometimes. Do you think you overreact or can be annoying to her?

She thinks it's ok to treat you that way because you are very close friends and she's annoyed. Could it be your actions causing the problem here?

Of course, she could have been kinder. But, sometimes the best of us get on our friends nerves.

[Bill3]

I asked her if she was really not going to tell me and if she wasn't that was pretty messed up. She then ignored my text for about an hour and said she'd talk to me tomorrow. Completely dismissing me.

Based on what you have said here, I would not consider her response to be completely dismissing me.

So I pressed on and followed up her text saying I hope that means tomorrow you are going to tell me what happened

She said good night and, indeed, you pressed on. You then are correct, it seems, in saying that her response indicated that she was fed up.

[Sunflower123]

You've been friends for a long time. At some time when you've both cooled down, why don't you sit down and talk it through? Friends get annoyed and fed up with each other. Maybe you two are so close she felt comfortable saying that to you. It would bother me as well but I'm sure you can work through it.

[kismetie]

I'm going to sit down and have a talk with her. One of our mutual friends is going to serve as a mediator. I would like someone more neutral as a mediator but I hope things can go well from here