How am i supposed to pick myself up

My boyfriend of 8 years left me, saying he wants space to figure things out and im devastated. I only want to be with him. I feel like i lost my best friend and i just want him back. And the only person i want to talk with about it is my dad and he died last year. All i keep doing is crying and i feel broken and cant pick myself up no matter how much i try. How am i supposed to deal with this?

I am sorry to hear that you are going through this ace.

Do you have any family, friends or a therapist that you can talk to? I know you said the only person you want to talk to is your dad, but that's not possible unfortunately. It might be good to have someone to talk to as you go through this difficult time. Even chatting with PC friends or continuing to post may help you get through this.

Did your partner elaborate on why he needed space? Are there things about the relationship that he is unhappy with, that could be changed? Maybe some couples counselling could help, but if he does decide to leave for good you'll need to accept that.

I dont have much family left they keep dying off, or i dont trust the rest.i talk to my friends but i feel guilty dumping on them, when i know they all have thwir own loves and problems. He said he wants space because hes not with his life, not necessarily us. He says he cant make me happy if hes not happy in life hiself. Which i understand, but i had little idea because he wouldnt talk to me about it. We a few issues but i didnt think they were so bad he would again. Because its not the first time but i love him regardless and its killing me. I want to do the same thing and make myself better, if theres ever a chance for reconciliation. But i cant pick myself up and then i really miss my dad. I brought up counsoling to him and he refuses he sayd they wont help or tell him anything new he doesnt already know

I'm sorry you're having such a tough time. I agree with scaredandconfused. Is there anybody you can talk to? You're going through a traumatic experience. Please be gentle and compassionate with yourself. Please continue posting if it helps. You can also PM me if that would help. Thinking of you.

Wow that must be hard. It will take you time, that is for sure. Sometimes moving or traveling helps... Go out with friends, talk to them, get busy with work, hobbies and volunteering. Maybe you cannot see it right now but there is a bigger reason it happened.
Why did he say he wants space, what has been happening? Do you think it is really over between you?

I really think if it's not the first time and you don't see it getting better, you should do yourself a favour and let go. But the reason he gave you is strange.

He just said hes not happy in his life, and if hes not happy with himself he cant make me happy. And that he feels like hes at a crossroads in his life and just doesnt know how he feels. He feels too busy. I want him to gey better but i dont understand why we cant figure it out together.

Could he be trying to say in a polite way that for whatever reason he just wants to move on?

I do t know because hes very confusing, he says he wants space, but will still continue to try to talk to me. Hes already said he wants me to basically wait, but obviously if i dont its my choice. Hes just very up and down and back and forth

How long are you willing to wait?

I dunno. Im obviously not looking for anyone anytime soon. But i dont think that if someone came along i should put them on hold to still wait for him. The problem is i truely love him. I didnt want to break up in the first place, but i cant see the future

Im very mixed up with all of this myself and dunno what to do. Dont know how to move on and let go. Dont want to , but dont know why i shouldnt want to

If you let him stay in touch with you then it will be exceedingly difficult for you to move on. He will have the ability to keep you in his back pocket while he figures things out or even considers other women.

Another approach would be to tell him that it is too painful to be in touch with him when he is broken up with you. You could tell him that you are cutting off contact, for your own mental well-being. Or you could tell him to contact you if he ever wants to resume the relationship, and you will think about it at that time. You could tell him, otherwise, to leave you alone.

This option will allow you to see things more clearly and, if time goes by and he won't commit to you, to find peace and move on.