[Jason765]

Me and my ex broke up almost a year ago and sinse then I have been trying to move on but nothings worked out. Me amd my ex are still good friends and we hang out quite a bit and recentky I have remembered how much we have in common and how much we are alike and I was thinking about asking her out again. We have a real connection but I don't know how she feels

I am not a fan of the whole staying friends thing (I'm in the minority here, I know).

What's better for you, moving on with your life or having her as a friend?

[Crazy Hitch]

How often do you two hang out, and what sort of things are you doing together? If you're doing things like going to dinner, watching movies etc. and it's pretty regular, then perhaps give it a go.

[bosslady.dsmhb]

Originally Posted by Jason765

Me and my ex broke up almost a year ago and sinse then I have been trying to move on but nothings worked out. Me amd my ex are still good friends and we hang out quite a bit and recentky I have remembered how much we have in common and how much we are alike and I was thinking about asking her out again. We have a real connection but I don't know how she feels

It is human nature to only remember the good after the loss of someone or something. Especially when your in the honeymoon stage of the relationship, and make no mistake about it, you are. Force yourself to remember why you are no longer together and talk about those things with your partner now before it becomes an issue again.(fingers crossed that it wont) Set clear boundaries and stick to them no matter what. Also discuss those boundaries with him or her. An easy and simple way to figure out your boundaries is to ask yourself this one question: "if they do (fill in the blank) am I truly willing to leave them over it?" if the answer is yes then that is a clear and dry boundary.

[bosslady.dsmhb]

Originally Posted by sophiesmom

I am not a fan of the whole staying friends thing (I'm in the minority here, I know).

What's better for you, moving on with your life or having her as a friend?

I agree, why torture yourself like that unless you have kids together. My kids dad and I are friends, check up on each other every so often but he is remarried and I am as well and there is nothing there so it works but my privious ex, no way, its was to hard even tho i thought it would be better to have him as a friend then not at all. No it wasnt. It left an element if hope. It takes the death of hope to let go and move on.

[eskielover]

I stayed friends with some guys but had to make it clear that I did not feel about them in a romantic way & it never would be. That may be the case in your situation too. It's hard to say if they haven't made that clear.

My rule of thumb was that the break-up wouldnt have happened if the relationship didn't have problems....just being friends doesn't fix those problems & just because you have common interests doesn't mean compatibility in a dating relationship.

[Sunflower123]

Why not ask her how she views the friendship? That will give you a better idea of whether to ask her out, remain friends or move on. Good luck and best wishes.

[Jason765]

Originally Posted by Crazy Hitch

How often do you two hang out, and what sort of things are you doing together? If you're doing things like going to dinner, watching movies etc. and it's pretty regular, then perhaps give it a go.

Well we mostly hung out at school and we have recently left and since then we hung out at our prom and she has been round mine and watched some movies

[Jason765]

Thanks to everyone who commented it good to hear others views about my situation and it doesn't help that I don't have much confidence either

[motogypsy]

Originally Posted by sophiesmom

I am not a fan of the whole staying friends thing (I'm in the minority here, I know).

What's better for you, moving on with your life or having her as a friend?

+1

In my experience, staying friends doesn't work out that well. A friend of mine told me once "if you could fall for them before, what's to say it won't happen again?", And I've experienced it before. You get caught up in the nostalgia of the "good ole days" and lose sight of why it DIDN'T work out before. Rarely does it work after it didn't.

Best wishes though.