[PaulyJ]

I met Garth around April and we were just friends well FWB nothing more nothing less just a cool friendship
In June I took Holiday for a month ok, an Garth an I did a lot of 1sts for me
e.g he took me hiking ive never done that before, he took me on one of his jobs, then it got abit more serious, I slept over at his house, it was my 1st time sleeping over at a guys house
then the following weekend I spent the weekend sleeping over, another 1st now after all of this in June my feelings started to grow… I become attached
july I told him I have feelings, he said lets just see how the friendship goes let the friendship grow, so I did
end of july we went on a awesome coastal road trip an it was awesome
beginning of august I told him that my feelings have grown more

he said Paul I don’t have romantic feelings for you BUT I still wanna be friends with you I still want you in my life u a good person etc
so I pleaded with him if we can just try to have a relationship lets just try it out an give it a try, he said no he doesn’t wanna put me through that cause if it doesn’t work it will all fall apart

ok so heres what you must know this is my 1St big crush on a guy ok
this is my 1st rejection
this is my 1st rejection and still being friends with the guy that rejected me

[Sunflower123]

I'm sorry you're having a tough time. Would it be better to cease contact with him to lessen your pain? I don't have any advice or suggestions but I wanted to let you know I hear you and I sympathize. Sending big hugs.

[PaulyJ]

His too much of a friend, i have put a little distance between us, so i can allow myself to heal with my emotions, but i cant cease contact with him, he is legit a really good guy his one of those rare friends you get, he has his faults obviously, just like we all do, but yeah i cant cease contact, its a situation where i just have to fight through this journey