[RDMercer]

Just like it says....

My wife and I have had our issues over the years, but I really think she is not a very sexual person either.

I have never been a player. This sounds bad, but before I met my wife, I never had to be. I had (willing) girlfriends . I treated these girls and women well, and tried to be a gentleman around them. I honestly never had to seduce anyone. Alone time just became intimate time or intense time. I also never lived with any of them, or saw them everyday. Marriage is a completely different environment.

Being pursued matters to my wife. Being treated differently matters to my wife. Being "nice" doesn't cut it. Effort and setting the stage matters to my wife.

Basically, I don't know WTF I'm doing when it comes to seduction, or how to transition from a "nice date" to "Ooooooh yeah.... This is happening."

Any ideas???

[TishaBuv]

Is this MY HUSBAND? Lol, jk

I have endless ideas for seduction!

Simplest first—. Just passionately say “Come here” and put your arms around her. It’ll happen from there.

A line that once worked on me was, “Take your pants off”. Ha

I call this Throw Down. My marriage is suffering over this issue, too.

I once had a guy i dated come up behind me when I was reading a book, gently take the book from me, put it down, and start kissing me which then turned into more. It helped that I was in the mood.

[Crazy Hitch]

Lots of compliments (genuine ones that you can find) about how attracted you are to her / how attractive she is can help build self esteem and confidence in her (especially when you're 'busy').

[Carmina]

Dance together

Spend some time just touching and in contact

Practice tantra

Go for a mindful walk hand in hand

Don't make it about sex, make it about sensuality

[RDMercer]

Thanks.

Carmina, I like that one. Shared mindfulness...

[Carmina]

Deep mirroring is also great for connecting

[s4ndm4n2006]

Originally Posted by Crazy Hitch

Lots of compliments (genuine ones that you can find) about how attracted you are to her / how attractive she is can help build self esteem and confidence in her (especially when you're 'busy').

don't leave out the word "genuine" with the "lots of compliments" thing. I mean it should be common sense but forced compliments are always a fail and telling someone simply to give lots of compliments tends to risk making them try too hard.