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  #1  
Old Oct 19, 2017, 12:30 PM
Anonymous50987
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My father talks about how I should manage my meals in university - he tells me to buy food there. Now the things is, I don't want to in order to save money. Discussion was made on how cheap it is, yet with my considerations to save money and put priority on making food at home.

The thing is, I feel no matter what, I will always feel my buttons are pushed and feel like buying food in university rather than make my determined choice to make food at home since it saves money in the long-term for future uses such as renting an apartment.

I really don't like this kind of micro-managing. I told him I prefer to focus on macro issues rather than micro ones. While I "convinced" him, I still feel like my buttons are pushed.

What do I do?

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  #2  
Old Oct 19, 2017, 07:20 PM
Anonymous40643
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Is he paying for any of your expenses while at school? If so, then he has some say in how that money is spent, or some right as a parent to give input. If he is not paying for any of your expenses, then it's your life and your choice, and he has no right to say how you choose to spend money (or not spend money).
  #3  
Old Oct 19, 2017, 09:26 PM
Anonymous49852
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Agreed with above, if it's not his money you should do what you want, if it is it's his choice.
  #4  
Old Oct 20, 2017, 06:38 AM
Anonymous50987
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It's my money involved, so that's why it annoyed me. Were it his money, I wouldn't care, honestly.
I'm just worried I'll have my buttons pushed until I'll become worn off and not be able to take care of myself and my future.
For example, I wanted to take care of something I talked about at the gathering of my father and brother. My father told me "You can also take care of it in a day or two. It can wait".
I really don't get it, why wait? What's his s***? smh
As I said, I am worried my buttons will be pushed till I fall. That's why I wanted to go to a far away university, where I had good gut feelings when I environmentally visited the place. In the nearby university, I have a bad gut feeling which makes me feel bad. It's about the environment, and I don't know what I'll do.
  #5  
Old Oct 20, 2017, 06:57 AM
Anonymous40643
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Sounds like your father is still parenting you, and seems like you may have to set some limits with him. If it were me, I would directly state for him to back off and give me some space and room to be an adult and to make my own decisions, but that's just me. I am very blunt and very direct sometimes. But limits do need to be established if you don't want his intrusions and for your buttons to not be pushed.

You could tell him, dad look, I got this. I am fine, I can take care of myself, I can make my own decisions and I can look after my own money and spend it as I choose to or not. Please let me be an adult now. Something like that. (((Hugs))))
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