[SMRY]

I’m curious: what relationship “fairytales” were you were sold on as a youngster and what happened to burst that bubble?

One of them for me was realizing that being married could not “fix” me and that my husband was only human, not a super hero. Oh yeah, and there is no such thing as a “soulmate”.

Still married after 3 decades - we still like each other lol! He really is a great guy.

[Sunflower123]

Congratulations!!! That’s great.

[Erebos]

That a relationship will only work if there is crazy chemistry and that love and passion equate to the same thing.
Relationships are for life. (Biggest b.s fairytale of them all.)
That loving someone means you should forgive them.(also b.s)

[SMRY]

Originally Posted by Erebos

That a relationship will only work if there is crazy chemistry and that love and passion equate to the same thing.
Relationships are for life. (Biggest b.s fairytale of them all.)
That loving someone means you should forgive them.(also b.s)

Good ones!!

How about this myth - once married you’ll never have any desire for someone else. When you have sex you’ll never fantasize about another lover.

[TishaBuv]

The prince did sweep me up onto his white horse and rode into the sunset. But, I’m struggling with that ‘happily ever after’ part.

[SMRY]

Originally Posted by TishaBuv

The prince did sweep me up onto his white horse and rode into the sunset. But, I’m struggling with that ‘happily ever after’ part.

They never show what happens after “and they lived happily ever after” rolls up on the screen at the end.

The “soulmates” myth really irks me. You can be soulmates with a lot of people for a variety of reasons.

Good thing is my spouse agrees and we laugh at all the myths. Been married over 3 decades and still like each other lol!

[TishaBuv]

Why is it even such a way people think that we must go in pairs? We’re not Salt and Pepper! Does one’s soul actually mate?

I’ve felt love with a few. I committed to one.

It might have been a fairy tale if not for real life problems and me developing an emotional disorder.

The fairy tale doesn’t say, “and then Cinderella had a crying melt down and OD’d...”

[SMRY]

Good one about souls actually “mating”!

Here’s another one - if s/he really loves me, s/he will change and stop doing XYZ.

And...now that we are together, I will never feel lonely the rest of my life!

All of these things I said in my previous messages and here are things I believed when I was younger about intimate relationships.

[TishaBuv]

Fairytales said ‘love conquers all’, and ‘a man will go through great effort for the woman he loves’. I still believe this.

Fairytales never said people will change and stop doing their bad habits for love. Rather, the lovers embrace each other for precisely who they are.

I could use a relationship fairytale

[Erebos]

The fairytales forget to mention that we grow and change as people.
The guys I wanted as a 17 year old are not who I wanted in my mid 20's.
And in my 30's what a wanted changed again.
We don't always grow together, sometimes we grow apart.
This isn't a failing, nor is it wrong, it's just human nature.

[SMRY]

Originally Posted by Erebos

The fairytales forget to mention that we grow and change as people.
The guys I wanted as a 17 year old are not who I wanted in my mid 20's.
And in my 30's what a wanted changed again.
We don't always grow together, sometimes we grow apart.
This isn't a failing, nor is it wrong, it's just human nature.

Well said!

[SMRY]

Originally Posted by Vibrating Obsidian

I could use a relationship fairytale

But eventually you would have to wake up!

[healingme4me]

Originally Posted by SMRY

And...now that we are together, I will never feel lonely the rest of my life!
.

This one, most definitely! Nothing like being in the same room, or even bed, and feeling worlds apart.

"They" certainly don't write the book on grating on nerves, temperature discrepancies, etc.

Kudos on 30 years and still liking each other. It's rather remarkable in this day and age. I know of many couples creeping up on that plateau. Many ups and downs tossed into that mix.