once again my nose is rubbed in it.

Well friends it has happened again only both ex husbands are tag-teaming.

A repeat yes, but perspective is due here. Husband #1 is biological father of my adult children. Husband #2 is their stepfather. They have always had a very close relationship with their father but it is with their step-dad that I find their relationship questionable. He was very public with his carrying on, bullying, and emotional abuse; factors which defy my imagination that his step-children would remain devoted to him.

Hours apart last night both exes really kicked me hard in the teeth.

Their father called to tell me not to buy such-in-such for them as he had done so. These were items in the neighbourhood of $500. He knows I am on disability. Why would he have called if it wasn't to rub my nose in it?

Then their step father called practically ordering me to buy them outdoor gear suitable for skiing. Once again he waived in my face that he had rented a ski chalet for the holidays. He spends a great deal on them including trips, etc. Again, I can only think that he was calling to purposely hurt my feelings.

On your friendly advice I have spoken with my children. I have told them I feel hurt that they consistently choose him over me. Their reaction? Was to turn it back on me and lay a guilt trip. I have been basically told to get over myself and they remind me that it was my choice to leave behind that lifestyle. I only have myself to blame.

Again, I don't expect you all to solve this quandry. I simply needed the opportunity to share.

Do they cone to you for emotional support & caring when they need it? Just wondering.

Sometimes people with money meet those desires but are very shallow when emotional issues are in need of being met.

You cant buy love with money, only temporary fun. Be their living & caring person. They are not necessarily choosing him over you they are just choosing things offered to them by that person.

Also no matter what they say....you gave up those things for your well being not because you didnt want them. Maybe a better perspective would help. When things come across as jealousy to others they dobt respond well to that even if its NOT where you are really coming from.

Just a thought. Have a friend who struggles with this too

I think it took alot of strength to have a talk with them, altho they reacted in a shytty way at least you let them know. Good for you !

Good for you talking to them. It took courage. That’s a shame though they are this way. Were they always that vain? I can’t imagine they turned vain and shallow all of a sudden. Do they verbatim say they choose others because they provide better life styles?