[annxo]

I did tell my boyfriend a week ago that I don't want to do anything special for Valentine's day because we are going through a move and don't have a lot of extra money. My boyfriend also had a court date the very next day (for a level 3 felony) so he was stressed about that.... I did go out and buy a sexy little outfit for him...but he didn't do ANYTHING special for me literally.... no flowers...no 5 dollar box of chocolates...not even a card.. All I got was "I wish I would have gotten you something for Valentine's Day other than d*ck." This will be our second Valentine's Day together by the way. I don't know why I feel so sad about it.... maybe because I seen my sister and a million other girls in relationship get super spoiled...It upset me to the point where I feel like I broke up with him....even tho I didn't but..... I'm not sure if I'm being over-dramatic, after-all it is just a hallmark holiday.

[beauflow]

I read your post and can relate.
With this being the 2nd year, can I suggest- talking to him on how he views holidays and anniversaries. I read an article a few years ago about how couples should talk on these topics before getting too serious.
Some people don't care, some do- all is ok as long as each other have understanding and love is shown in other ways. Everyone has their own relationships.

I also read an article that every couple has ( and should have) disagreement with a topic in life - (like I like a certain band that my ex hates, but I still listened to them and he loved me anyways).

I bring that up because- there's nothing "wrong with you for wanting to cerebrate" a holiday, anniversaries, etc
But also to ask yourself, is it a deal breaker if he doesn't want to cerebrate?

This doesn't mean he doesn't have to show intimacy in other ways beside "some d*ck"..

I believe we all do need our partners to show that they care, relationships are a two way street.. but then again I got my own hang ups-- your post, I get why it's upsetting, and myself been upset to see others get flowers, while I'm told"yeah sorry but I love you"...

In my case I had so much issues talking effectively with him on the subject, I wish I knew more about DBT at the time to be honest.
I hope this reaches you well and that you find what you need.

[MickeyCheeky]

Perhaps he's just not very interested in celebrations and holidays. How is the rest of the relationship going? Does he treat you well?

[greentires4me]

Well you did say “nothing special for valentines to him” so in a guys mind that directly means I don’t want or need anything. You have to be rather direct with him or he will not get the subtle hints it seems.

[possum220]

Originally Posted by annxo

I did tell my boyfriend a week ago that I don't want to do anything special for Valentine's day because we are going through a move and don't have a lot of extra money.

Guys will take you quite literally in what is said. He was also possible worried his court appearance. Nobody can read minds. Maybe next time you could spell it out for him.

[annxo]

Being a few days later I feel much better, Especially after reading your feedback. I think that I was just being dramatic. We are going through a move so things have been so stressful lately... I should also add that he did buy me flowers last year..

[Crazy Hitch]

Hopefully if he realises how upset this has made you ... he might do something small next year, even a little card can go a long way