[rdgrad15]

I've noticed lately that I don't seem to find joy in social interactions. I feel way more sad and just don't really care as much now. After being hurt and ghosted out abruptly and for unknown reasons or even no reason through the years, I can tell I am becoming less willing for people to get too close to me now. I actually expect people to leave me eventually, and yes it always does hurt, I am always expecting it and used to it at the same time as well. I still socialize with people, but I don't find the joy in it as much since in the back of my mind, I know they will drop me eventually especially if they find something else better or someone else they like better. I feel sad a lot and other times I just feel emotionally numb, like I just simply don't care anymore.

[Agent Misty]

I'm like this in the sense that I find little joy in socializing with most people. Its not about being left behind or forgotten or anything for me, though. It is just boring to me.

[rdgrad15]

Originally Posted by Agent Misty

I'm like this in the sense that I find little joy in socializing with most people. Its not about being left behind or forgotten or anything for me, though. It is just boring to me.

Oh okay. In some cases I am bored too but in most cases it is the result of years of rejection, unexplained and sudden ghosting by friends, exclusion from groups, and being left behind in general by others.

[emgreen]

I sometimes think giving complex clinical terms to phenomenon can make matters worse. The situation you're describing sounds very similar to me, but I attribute it to simple depression. When depressed I sometimes get almost agoraphobic & have lost friends because of that. Similarly I feel a decreased joy in general when I experience that with people. In other words, I know (I think) what you're feeling. Maybe if you think of it as simple baseline depression you won't feel as isolated/"odd" as you do now? Just a thought.

[rdgrad15]

Originally Posted by emgreen

I sometimes think giving complex clinical terms to phenomenon can make matters worse. The situation you're describing sounds very similar to me, but I attribute it to simple depression. When depressed I sometimes get almost agoraphobic & have lost friends because of that. Similarly I feel a decreased joy in general when I experience that with people. In other words, I know (I think) what you're feeling. Maybe if you think of it as simple baseline depression you won't feel as isolated/"odd" as you do now? Just a thought.

Yeah depression can cause it.

[cool09]

I forgot what it feels like for someone to stick around. In the hospital last month someone ghosted me and I thought "Well. this is a new low for me...". I only expect people who are being paid a service (psychiatrist, etc.) for me to stand by me and I can kind of tell when they've had enough of me.

[rdgrad15]

Originally Posted by cool09

I forgot what it feels like for someone to stick around. In the hospital last month someone ghosted me and I thought "Well. this is a new low for me...". I only expect people who are being paid a service (psychiatrist, etc.) for me to stand by me and I can kind of tell when they've had enough of me.

Yeah I know the feeling.

[nightingale77]

Hi there, thank you for sharing. To some extend, I can relate to how you feel. I remembered my first experience of rejection was from a good Friend in primary school. We were closed friends and I was her Friend according to her mood. WHenever she was in a good mood, she talked to me. If not, I was a stranger to her. That was when I got my first taste of rejection from Friend. Ever since then, I don’t trust people who are willing to stick around. I’m sure they will leave me after a while hence I’m seldom ‘ invested’ in any relationship because I don’t want to get hurt. But that somehow change. I started having friends that I have kept for more than 20 years and they still stick around despite how annoying or negative I can be sometimes. They look beyond my baddest and embrace me just the same. I’m not dismissing your hurt. I’m not making what you have been through sound insignificant. What you have gone through is real and painful. But give the next someone a chance to be your Friend. YOu never know this Friend might just be someone who sticks. I hope this brings you some comfort. You sound like a wonderful person. You really do. Keepingyou in my prayer. GOd bless!

[WasabiAlmonds]

It sounds like you're tuning out from people and social interactions before they tune you out; it's a defense mechanism.

Simply getting one good, honest relationship in your life can get us back on track.

[rdgrad15]

Originally Posted by WasabiAlmonds

It sounds like you're tuning out from people and social interactions before they tune you out; it's a defense mechanism.

Simply getting one good, honest relationship in your life can get us back on track.

It always seems like people tune me out but yeah I probably donthe same. It is a form of protection. I agree, a good relationship would help.

[rdgrad15]

Originally Posted by nightingale77

Hi there, thank you for sharing. To some extend, I can relate to how you feel. I remembered my first experience of rejection was from a good Friend in primary school. We were closed friends and I was her Friend according to her mood. WHenever she was in a good mood, she talked to me. If not, I was a stranger to her. That was when I got my first taste of rejection from Friend. Ever since then, I don’t trust people who are willing to stick around. I’m sure they will leave me after a while hence I’m seldom ‘ invested’ in any relationship because I don’t want to get hurt. But that somehow change. I started having friends that I have kept for more than 20 years and they still stick around despite how annoying or negative I can be sometimes. They look beyond my baddest and embrace me just the same. I’m not dismissing your hurt. I’m not making what you have been through sound insignificant. What you have gone through is real and painful. But give the next someone a chance to be your Friend. YOu never know this Friend might just be someone who sticks. I hope this brings you some comfort. You sound like a wonderful person. You really do. Keepingyou in my prayer. GOd bless!

Yeah I've met people like that. Turns out people like that are not really friends, even though they may seem like it. And I know, I should give people a chance but since it has happened so many times over many many years, it almost makes more sense to basically not allow anyone to get too close. I don't think people really even feel that close to me but I still feel like I need to be careful.