[Betrayed92]

I'm posting this because I need to vent. I talked on the phone to my ex husband earlier today ,and at first it was going well until he brought up the topic of us getting back getting back together but he would get to keep seeing his lover, and I told him that I didn't want get back together with him if It meant he wouldn't faithful to only me. I also told him that he would have to treat me better to me then he did in the past and he got really angry with me and I hung up on him because I didn't want to list to his tirade against me. I wish that every conversation with him wouldn't end like this.

Are you talking to him because you have kids together or unresolved feelings? My advice, not that you asked for advice, but no contact helps the healing process move along much faster. And if he cheated on you but you want monogamy? All the more reason to stop all communications with him. So he gets his cake and eats it too with you? NO -- not from your standpoint. Plus, once someone treats you poorly, that most likely will continue and will worsen over time. Best to cut your losses.

[Betrayed92]

Originally Posted by golden_eve

Are you talking to him because you have kids together or unresolved feelings? My advice, not that you asked for advice, but no contact helps the healing process move along much faster. And if he cheated on you but you want monogamy? All the more reason to stop all communications with him. So he gets his cake and eats it too with you? NO -- not from your standpoint. Plus, once someone treats you poorly, that most likely will continue and will worsen over time. Best to cut your losses.

I'm mostly talking to him because we have a child together but also because I still need to resolved my feelings toward him. I think that I'm going to limit contact with him to just talk about co-parenting with him.

Originally Posted by Betrayed92

I'm mostly talking to him because we have a child together but also because I still need to resolved my feelings toward him. I think that I'm going to limit contact with him to just talk about co-parenting with him.

Great idea. You deserve far better. Never settle for less than what you deserve and want.

[Shazerac]

If it were me I would limit my conversation to parenting issues. Talking about getting back togather when he wants to keep his mistress is beyond ridulous and will only hurt you more.

[s4ndm4n2006]

Getting back together isn't actualy getting back together when he wants to remain unfaithful to you. That's just like him having his cake and eat it too, and you'd just be like his "other' mistress in a way. I don't see how this is logical or how he might think it's even acceptable at all.

I agree with others. Limit times and subject matter with conversations. talk about what is necessary and cut off conversation as soon as it breaks that rule and he starts talking about anything unacceptable. he'll figure out it's not something you are going to have a conversation about after you've cut him off or hung up a few times when he does that.