[dragonphoto]

Have you ever given so much that you don't feel like giving anymore? Have you ever felt like you are not going down the right path? Have you ever felt like the one person in your life you can trust does not love you anymore?

I have asked myself these questions over the past three days and I have come to the conclusion...the answers are not as important as the journey. The path that I have travelled has given me so many insights that I want to share. So many real thoughts and feelings. I still yearn to hold her in my arms and tell her everything is going to be ok. That wall is still up...she does not want to get hurt again. All I can say is I don't blame her however, I am a different person. I can think more clearly and express my emotions the proper way...but all I can do now is wait. My path has taken me from the darkside of my forest of thought facing my demons...to a path that is so bright that I feel the warmth on my skin.

I am so glad that I have taken this journey and God and my friends have been there for me. So now I walk this path...not alone anymore...but with the support of my family, friends and most of all my wife. With out these people I would still be headed down this path of darkness. Thank you to everyone that has been there for me.

[bebop]

your wife? are things going better then? I am happy for you!

[dragonphoto]

Bebop, I am not sure if things are going better for us, but I have found that path that I need to follow. I have struggled for years in hopes that I would just happen upon that fork in the road. For so long I had been sad and angry (jealous too a little) and I have finally seen the path that my life is destined to follow.

[Sultrysorrow]

I feel that way every minute of every day and night that I am with my wife.
And yet I will constantaly ask myself:
Am I doing enough?
Is she happy with me?
Did I make the right decision?
Is she uspet at me?
Etc...Etc....

So yes because of my mental instability I have the potential to seriously jeopardize this marrige and friendship I have w/ my beautiful wife.

I understand your situation... And unfortunately, alot of times you just have to go thru the motions. To keep the peace within yourself and your partner...