[NeedHelp104]

Hi everyone,

I have some sort of PTSD-anxiety from bullying in the workplace. I get anxious thinking about getting another job because of it . People would pick on me for almost everything and it made me very depressed. I remember they would pick on me for not having a girlfriend, not dating much, being 'too intelligent' (I had highest GPA and credentials for the job), other people would report me for things that were not true because they did not like me so I quit on the job because I could not handle very toxic work environment anymore. For training aspect of job, i would get yelled at for small errors in front of others. My manager would embarrass me in front of other colleagues by telling me I am the worst worker, she would downplay my successes and in the same rhythm comment that I am "very intelligent". My manager had it out for me and would accuse me of things were not true. I quit on the spot and she told me she was "Shocked" I quit despite her in the past saying I do not show initiative, blah blah blah (things were NOT true). I've never been in an environment like this before where I ACTUALLY had people target me. I was not part of their "clique" and I am terrified of it happening again. To this day I struggle with anxiety because of it. . It really became personal when other people would say, "You have no girlfriend. No friends. Don't party or go out and drink." That hurt the most. I'm trying hard to make friends and having someone expose that to me really hurt. these things were personal to me and it hurt so much. Telling me how "different" I am. I had to leave for my own mental health but it hurt so much that people would go out of there way to tear me down. I'm so scared it will happen again. All I wanted to do was work and make money and I left because of toxic environment. I want to get a new job but I'm scared of having to fit in. Any advice?

[Open Eyes]

(((NeedHelp)))), I am sorry you experienced that. The work environment you describe is definitely an unhealthy work environment. You actually made the right choice when you left. When people begin to get personal like that in a work environment that is a red flag that you are not in a healthy respectful environment and the best way to handle it is to leave. Depending on the size of the work environment if there is an HR department you can go and complain because these situations should be addressed.

No one should be picking on you for what your relationship status is or if you are willing to drink and party with others. None of that is important, what IS important is that you do your job.

Please know you did the right thing by choosing to leave that work environment. This is also true for any toxic situation you find yourself in, be it in a group of friends or in any kind of relationship.

[ARaven0137]

I'm so sorry you went through that. It's a difficult choice whether you stick it out or leave and you have to do what's right for you. I have been bullied and bullying is very prevalent at my job now and I've seen a lot of toxic environments. I also did one of my graduate theses on workplace bullying since I saw so much of it.

You should definitely take your time and make sure that your next work environment suits you. Depending on your financial situation, maybe you can afford to be picky and not just have to accept anything. Perhaps even an employment service would benefit you for a good fit.

[winter4me]

Do take your time. When you interview try to get a sense of the attitude, get a tour of the place and see how people look (body language, eye contact etc)---trust your gut.
Many of us who work long enough go through a bad experience or three---sometimes it is built into the culture of the workplace and sometimes it is just a bad fit but know that you deserve to be treated with respect. (I can remember turning down several jobs after interviewing with a would-be supervisor who clearly has little real regard for the people they supervise...and I would always ask for an interview/to meet the person who would be my immediate supervisor if at all possible...)

[Buffy01]

Originally Posted by NeedHelp104

Hi everyone,

I have some sort of PTSD-anxiety from bullying in the workplace. I get anxious thinking about getting another job because of it . People would pick on me for almost everything and it made me very depressed. I remember they would pick on me for not having a girlfriend, not dating much, being 'too intelligent' (I had highest GPA and credentials for the job), other people would report me for things that were not true because they did not like me so I quit on the job because I could not handle very toxic work environment anymore. For training aspect of job, i would get yelled at for small errors in front of others. My manager would embarrass me in front of other colleagues by telling me I am the worst worker, she would downplay my successes and in the same rhythm comment that I am "very intelligent". My manager had it out for me and would accuse me of things were not true. I quit on the spot and she told me she was "Shocked" I quit despite her in the past saying I do not show initiative, blah blah blah (things were NOT true). I've never been in an environment like this before where I ACTUALLY had people target me. I was not part of their "clique" and I am terrified of it happening again. To this day I struggle with anxiety because of it. . It really became personal when other people would say, "You have no girlfriend. No friends. Don't party or go out and drink." That hurt the most. I'm trying hard to make friends and having someone expose that to me really hurt. these things were personal to me and it hurt so much. Telling me how "different" I am. I had to leave for my own mental health but it hurt so much that people would go out of there way to tear me down. I'm so scared it will happen again. All I wanted to do was work and make money and I left because of toxic environment. I want to get a new job but I'm scared of having to fit in. Any advice?

I understand how you feel. Because I been through this myself. Have you thought about gathering hard evidence of the bullying and suing the company? Remember these people are insecure with themselves and are unhappy about their life. There is nothing wrong with not dating perhaps your career is more important than dating and you want a financial stability now. Perhaps you don't shares the same interest with people who you work with. Have you thought about them how do they know whether or not you actually have a partner or any friends unless they were spying on you? Have you thought about taking them that what you do in your own time is none of their business.

[MickeyCheeky]

I am so sorry this happened to You, @NeedHelp104! You didn't deserve that! I completely agree with all the other wise and wonderful Posters! You did the right thing! It is not fair of them to treat you like that. You stood up for Yourself! I am sure that You'll be able to find another Job REALLY soon. Don't let this negative Experience Condition you or Influence You too much. It was just one experience. Hopefully Your next one will be MUCH better! Give it a try and let us know how it goes! Sending many safe, warm hugs to BOTH You, @NeedHelp104, ALL of Your Family, ALL of Your Friends and ALL of Your Loved Ones! Keep fighting and keep rocking NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, OK, MY DEAR, SWEET, KIND, AWESOME, STRONG, WISE, SMART, INTELLIGENT, SAGE, THOUGHTFUL AND WONDERFUL FRIEND?!

[Buffy01]

Originally Posted by MickeyCheeky

I am so sorry this happened to You, @NeedHelp104! You didn't deserve that! I completely agree with all the other wise and wonderful Posters! You did the right thing! It is not fair of them to treat you like that. You stood up for Yourself! I am sure that You'll be able to find another Job REALLY soon. Don't let this negative Experience Condition you or Influence You too much. It was just one experience. Hopefully Your next one will be MUCH better! Give it a try and let us know how it goes! Sending many safe, warm hugs to BOTH You, @NeedHelp104, ALL of Your Family, ALL of Your Friends and ALL of Your Loved Ones! Keep fighting and keep rocking NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, OK, MY DEAR, SWEET, KIND, AWESOME, STRONG, WISE, SMART, INTELLIGENT, SAGE, THOUGHTFUL AND WONDERFUL FRIEND?!

That is great advice!

[Fuzzybear]

[Buffy01]

Originally Posted by Open Eyes

(((NeedHelp)))), I am sorry you experienced that. The work environment you describe is definitely an unhealthy work environment. You actually made the right choice when you left. When people begin to get personal like that in a work environment that is a red flag that you are not in a healthy respectful environment and the best way to handle it is to leave. Depending on the size of the work environment if there is an HR department you can go and complain because these situations should be addressed.

No one should be picking on you for what your relationship status is or if you are willing to drink and party with others. None of that is important, what IS important is that you do your job.

Please know you did the right thing by choosing to leave that work environment. This is also true for any toxic situation you find yourself in, be it in a group of friends or in any kind of relationship.

That is great advice.