[hobbypoet]

I haven't dated or liked anyone, truly, in 6 years so I'm in unfamiliar territory. I don't know what's normal and what isn't. But I feel like the guy I like isn't that into me.

I shared a picture the other day and there was no compliment about my appearance or anything. The conversation was dropped.

He disappears sometimes a for a day or more without communication or explanation. If he's going through something he shuts me out and won't open up.

We're talking less.

He says things like "I like you" and "I love you" but then is really hot and cold.

We've been talking for two months now and nothing has progressed. We still haven't even talked over the phone even though we exchanged numbers.

He is busy all the time. I often don't feel like a priority. There's no "Good morning" or "good night" texts. Sometimes I feel like I'm just here when it's convenient.

Is this how it's supposed to be? I'm just not very clear about things.

[divine1966]

Have you ever met?

If you never spoke on the phone he could be anyone. Teenager or married man, anyone. No it’s not how it’s supposed to be

[tigerlily84]

I agree with divine1966. If you haven't met this person they could be anyone, unfortunately. I think if he wanted to talk to you, he would. Believe his actions, not his words. Ask yourself if you don't send a text to him, will he send one to you to find out how you're doing?

[hobbypoet]

Yeah, I've been thinking about that too. Most people are pretty up front about already being in a relationship, so I figure he would have stated that by now and not said some of the things he's said. But who knows? We haven't met in person, he lives in another state. I was hoping we'd talk on the phone, then move to the meet in person level but it doesn't seem to be going there. I feel like there's something else in the picture going on but he's not talking about it. I do know he does work a lot, an essential worker and crazy hours but I also know that no one is always so busy....in reality....

I feel like I'm being strung along. I think I know what the solution is, and that's to move on.

[CharlieGyrle]

This a tough spot to be in.

I think you post holds the answer, at least for today.

Sometimes people are very distracted by other events in their lives.

I'd remain friends and not put all of my eggs in one basket. Keep your options open.

[eskielover]

I wouldn't waste my time. The longer you keep trying to hold onto hope that this person means more to you than you mean to them the more miserable you make yourself.

FYI.....I have been out of my marriage for 13 years.....I have never dated & I LOVE being alone. It has given me the healing time I have needed after leaving a 33 year marriage & I have now been able to truly KNOW who I am without trying to be something for someone else (even though I had a computer engineering career during my marriage)

[AceRimmer]

You really shouldn't get attached to people who you haven't even met yet.

[divine1966]

Most long distance relationships don’t work (some do). It’s just to hard to accomplish.

Nowadays when it’s not that extremely hard to find local people to date, very few people would pursue someone from out of state especially if they have never met them.

Him telling you he loves you is red flag. He can’t possibly love you. He doesn’t even know you. Be careful, might be a catfish and or romance scammer who’ll start asking for money soon. Be safe

[BobbyNeville]

My Mother was recently made a victim of this.
She doesn’t even believe that it’s not real yet.

You are starting the process of becoming aware.
It’s normal to feel hurt or angry or that something is wrong with you.
Nothing is wrong with you. A lot is wrong with the internet.

Be kind and patient with yourself. Listen to the people who defend you

[Rive.]

How can he say things like "I like you" and "I love you" when (1) you've never even talked on the phone and, I assume, you've never even met (2) you've only known one another for two months?! (3) he blows hot and cold with you and (4) is too busy for you.

This is not a relationship nor anything resembling 'love'. Seems he is using you.

This is not how it's supposed to be.